Sometimes when you’re trying to make changes in life, it can be easy to get in your own way.
Today we have Ashrita Tiwari on the show to discuss with us how we can work on our own self conscious tendencies in order to help make more positive changes in our lives.
Learn more and connect with Ashrita at: ashritatiwari.com and on Instagram @ashrita_coach
Listen in at: http://www.jasonmefford.com/jammingwithjason/
Transcript
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Jason Mefford: Well, I am super excited for today’s episode, because I have my friend, a street it tiwari with me.
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Jason Mefford: And you know I don’t know if you are, like me, probably are like a lot of people that sometimes you’re trying to make changes in your life.
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Jason Mefford: And you just can’t figure out why you keep self sabotaging yourself, you know there’s there’s things that you want to accomplish there’s things that you want to do.
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Jason Mefford: But you’re sitting there and it’s almost like you’re just trapped in your consciousness and just can’t move forward.
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Jason Mefford: Well, stay tuned because if you have felt that if you’ve ever felt that, and if you haven’t you probably will, if you haven’t already.
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Jason Mefford: That make sure and listen to this entire episode, because what we’re going to talk about today are some of the keys to helping you unlock that and get you to be able to have those things in life that you really want so with that let’s roll the episode.
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Jason Mefford: All right, a street.
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Jason Mefford: Welcome welcome welcome, how are you.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Thank you, thanks for having me here Jason i’m really excited for this conversation.
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Jason Mefford: I hope so.
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Jason Mefford: If not you’re gonna be before the yen right it’s.
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Jason Mefford: You know it’s it’s funny because we’re as we were talking before I mean.
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Jason Mefford: You have a varied background, which I think is an amazing thing I mean that’s why I, you know one thing I love to do is learn and.
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Jason Mefford: And we really don’t learn or how we really learn is when we’re able to be trained or learn about a lot of different things and be able to.
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Jason Mefford: find the commonalities with it right so so maybe to start off because i’ve known you for a little while, but even as before we hit record, there were some things I didn’t know about you.
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Jason Mefford: Right so maybe just just give people a little thumbnail as to who you are and then we’ll jump into talking about the main the main topic for the day to be able to help people out.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah Thank you so hi everyone so um I, my name is a street and I was so it’s interesting I was actually not born in the United States i’m currently I currently live in the United States, but I wasn’t born here, I came to the United States.
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Ashrita Tiwari: At age six and for those of you who live in the United States, you probably have heard of the American dream, the immigrant story that many people from around the world will come to the United States to to.
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Ashrita Tiwari: REACH this American dream and that’s exactly what my family did my parents did so prior to coming to the United States at age six my parents actually left me and my brother in Nepal, for several years.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And they came here in and really looking for the dream dream dream work and life right because in Nepal For those of you who don’t know.
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Ashrita Tiwari: deposits are our country and there really isn’t a lot of opportunities there, and nowadays there is because of the Internet right the power of Internet which we can talk about.
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Ashrita Tiwari: But back in the 1980s, there really wasn’t any opportunities, and so my my parents were seeking a better future for themselves and their family, and so they came here and for us, that was a big deal back then.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Because getting a visa to the United States is like just winning the lottery right that’s like a huge thing, and so I came here when I was each six and the purpose of.
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Ashrita Tiwari: my brother and I coming here was to become educated right there isn’t a lot of educational opportunities in Nepal there wasn’t at least when I was little and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: The whole goal was for us to do really well in the United States and get into a good college, like many people on right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And and get a new get a good job, live a good life, and so, so I came to me as a six, however, my family wasn’t really necessarily well off or wealthy right so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I grew up living in a household with five people, so it was my parents my brother and I and my sister, who was born here in the United States.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And there was five of us living in a one bedroom apartment for so long and we kind of moved around a lot, when I was a little girl.
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Ashrita Tiwari: From apartment to apartment and many of the apartments for a little and we work we woke up or we We grew up working class and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: i’m really grateful actually for those experiences that I had my early ages, because I learned a lot about myself and my work my own work ethic, but at the same time, there are a lot of things that.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Also, make things a little bit difficult when I was when I became an adult.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And I actually a little bit more about me I ended up being the first person in my family to attend college to go to college I got into my dream college, which is Boston college.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And became the first in my family, which was huge for us, and then a couple years later I ended up getting my masters, which was I also was the first with my masters in higher ED and leadership.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And while I was in my program and my master’s program I became really interested in health and wellness just because.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I wanted to balance everything that I was doing myself, so I kind of just fell on it like it wasn’t even something I planned.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And I realized when I would focus on my health and wellness and really focus on my habits that I actually was excelling in my classes as well, and also excelling in my internships.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And, and so I knew there was something there and I started to really just follow that like it was an intuitive knowing that I just followed.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And a couple years later, actually ended up becoming certified as a personal trainer because I realized Oh, this is something i’m really good at, and people are asking me a lot of questions about this so maybe I can start really working in this, and so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I started my business in personal training, while I was working full time and it wasn’t until maybe recently until this year that I left my nine to five job that I had.
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Ashrita Tiwari: gone to school for many years for and decided to go all in and my business and so now i’m actually hypnotherapist and I work with clients on helping them clear their subconscious fears and help them through self sabotage right help them through their habits.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And yeah that’s kind of a little bit of what I do now and, and I know there’s a lot to explore there Jason so.
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Jason Mefford: Well there’s.
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Jason Mefford: there’s there’s a lot to unpack there with.
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Jason Mefford: What we’re doing right now what’s interesting because you know, again we talked about.
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Jason Mefford: On my podcast we talked about what we talked about but we talked about a lot of things that we don’t talk about too right so.
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Jason Mefford: So one of the things that I that I found interesting that I want to make sure that people don’t jump over is the experience you had there when you were in college.
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Jason Mefford: And, and so make sure that I heard this right is, you said you know when I when I started focusing on my habits and on my health.
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Jason Mefford: I realized right that my schoolwork was going better everything else was going better right.
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Jason Mefford: And, and I think this is it’s it’s one of those key lessons for people and it’s sometimes it’s pretty damn hard.
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Jason Mefford: To to let go and to go that way right, because it seems, you know, especially in immigrant to this country.
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Jason Mefford: I you know I know you know most you know first generation immigrant families there’s a lot of pressure put on the kids because it’s like.
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Jason Mefford: We sacrificed, we came to this country we’re sending you Boston college great great higher ED institution right and it’s like so they’re.
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Jason Mefford: they’re putting all their hopes and their dreams and their investment in you and so i’m sure there was a lot of pressure for you to do well at school, but what’s so interesting is that when we take the time.
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Jason Mefford: For those habits for our health, it seems counterintuitive.
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Jason Mefford: yeah right.
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Jason Mefford: Like i’m i’m taking time away from my school work.
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Jason Mefford: To go to the gym or do whatever i’m doing right.
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Jason Mefford: But by doing it it actually helps you in this other part of your wife said normal.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah um yeah actually that that is part of taking care of yourself and creating habits and routines for yourself right so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: For my for myself right I realized that the more that I would focus on my physical health which was committing to my workouts at that time, when I first explored health and wellness I really got into crossfit so I don’t know if your audience knows.
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Ashrita Tiwari: crossfit but I was really competitive and an athlete and that and the more that I committed to showing up for my classes, a lot of times, it was early right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: The more that I would have clarity throughout the day in regards to my classes and the lessons that I was teaching at that time I was also.
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Ashrita Tiwari: A teacher, I was a ta and teaching, a group of students, they were like almost the same age as me right here, I am in front of a classroom college classroom.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Teaching at least like 40 to 50 students and so in a way, the health and wellness allowed me to build confidence in myself right but also.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Stay productive and stay focused when So when I have to sit down and write a research paper or if I had to like i’m read a whole book within a week, which was.
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Ashrita Tiwari: which was something they asked for a lot right during that time I could actually sit and focus and that’s because I gave my brain a break, when I would take care of myself right when I would exercise.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And it also just gave me more energy internally right so and I actually tested this out a little bit, where I was like Okay, let me see what would happen if I don’t exercise for like exercise is like really focused on my nutrition.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And running I also got into like marathon half marathon running at that time, let me just not do this for a couple weeks and see what happens and I noticed that my energy level just went way down right like it was just way down and I felt.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Not motivated I didn’t felt energized to do my work so for me, I feel like the exercise that eating well the really making sure i’m cooking food for myself and rather than.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Eating out right those things, yes, they take time right um but for me it felt so worth it, because I noticed how different I felt, and it was really for me, it was the feeling, because that that was what was driving.
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Ashrita Tiwari: My productivity and my motivation right all of that came along with taking care of myself.
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Jason Mefford: Well i’m guessing you probably hear this from your clients because i’ve heard this from people that I know I felt this way myself right where.
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Jason Mefford: we’re sometimes we think you know what I don’t have time to go for a half an hour walk I don’t have time to go to the gym I don’t have time to eat more healthy right it’s it’s much quicker to just go through the drive through.
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Jason Mefford: You know, and because we don’t have time but.
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Jason Mefford: Just know more, we we can’t afford not to take the time.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Right yeah.
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Jason Mefford: Because of because of the benefits that you see like you said you even tried, where you went for a couple weeks without it.
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Jason Mefford: And you could tell a big difference.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Right yeah absolutely absolutely and the other part, that I didn’t share also was you know, a big part of why I got into health and wellness.
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Ashrita Tiwari: The driving motivation for me was I grew up watching my mom so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: My mom actually developed schizophrenia at a very young age, so it’s a mental illness For those of you who don’t know and they.
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Ashrita Tiwari: When you have schizophrenia there’s a lot of hallucination and you see things right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And so, growing up, there was a lot of chaos in my household because of that in On top of that, I watched my mom develop diabetes.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And I watched this as a little girl her kind of get worse, every year, right through her lifestyle and, although, like I didn’t make that connection at first.
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Ashrita Tiwari: The more I started to dive into this work I realized that’s why i’ve been so motivated by this work.
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Ashrita Tiwari: was because on an uncommon like on a subconscious level, I was holding on to this belief that I didn’t want to be like my mom like I didn’t want to end up like my mom.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And that was the work that I discovered more when I started to dive into subconscious reprogramming and like understanding, some of those beliefs, that we don’t normally look at.
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Ashrita Tiwari: um but, for me, one of the motivating things was my mom and and I think many people.
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Ashrita Tiwari: That are listening to probably can relate to this right have probably watched either family members or friends close to them, who have.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Probably on an unconscious level right create have created choices that have led to some sort of illness or some sort of weight gain or some sort of mental.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Mental illness or something right and a lot of it is things that we can control, which is empowering right it’s this is it’s really empowering to know hey we can control this.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And the choices that we make the lifestyle choices we make can make a big difference in whether you end up getting diabetes or not right or whether you end up with some sort of.
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Ashrita Tiwari: illness right that we can actually prevent and so a driving factor for me, was also this knowing that, like my mom had schizophrenia my mom had developed, diabetes and my father also has.
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Ashrita Tiwari: He has arthritis right and so like I grew up with all of these health complications and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I didn’t really know at a young age, that what was driving it I just knew that there was something that wasn’t right like something that my parents were doing was.
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Ashrita Tiwari: They were missing something right, and so, and then, when I started exploring crossfit I noticed how great I felt and how how more confident, I felt in the classroom even in dating I felt so much more confident dating right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: um, and so I knew that I had to keep following that like there was something there and so so yeah you’re right I think people don’t realize.
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Ashrita Tiwari: that yes, right now, and might feel like it’s going to take time out of your schedule, but think about how much time receiving later on in those years right like.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And i’ve watched my parents just take tons of pills right like and pharmaceutical pills.
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Ashrita Tiwari: That actually yes they’re helping their symptoms temporarily but they’re creating all these other complications in the long run right so, and so I don’t know if that’s helpful to hear that, but that was also part of why i’m so committed to my health and wellness because i’ve seen I.
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Ashrita Tiwari: started what it can do when you don’t focus on your health and wellness.
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Jason Mefford: Oh it’s interesting because, like you said it’s not just you know years down the line, which obviously there are benefits as we get older right, the more active, we are now, the more we avoid certain things in the future.
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Jason Mefford: Some of us wait.
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Jason Mefford: Right until those things crop up and then it’s like oh shit now i’ve got to do something, because I do have diabetes, or whatever right.
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Jason Mefford: But but what’s interesting is even even at the short micro thing right like that that decision that we’re consciously trying to make of well I don’t really have a half an hour to go for a walk well.
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Jason Mefford: But isn’t your productivity, probably going to be greater even in that current day I probably more than the 30 minutes if you take that time away and then come back to do what it is that you need to do.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah absolutely absolutely and and it’s actually not good for our brains to be constantly just working right you actually want to give your brain a break so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Whether that’s just like maybe taking a lunch break at noon, or maybe in the morning, whatever it is, but I always recommend my clients.
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Ashrita Tiwari: That they make some effort to like get out of their desks right and just move for a little bit right whether it’s just going on time for 15 minutes.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And, and I don’t know if you talk about this, but just being outside right like being out there with sun is so helpful for our health, like it actually helps our immune system and helps us.
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Ashrita Tiwari: in so many ways that people don’t realize and just a simple act of walk walking there’s so many health benefits, just to walking and you know I know I talked about crossfit and all of that right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: But you don’t have to do that, you can just go for a walk right and start making that a habit.
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Jason Mefford: yeah what is something easy that anybody can do right, no matter what you’re at I mean I.
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Jason Mefford: little about me right, I grew up being a runner.
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Jason Mefford: Right I ran cross country and track and everything and.
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Jason Mefford: It was always you know always did good about going from my run every day I haven’t done that so well, the last little while as i’ve gotten to middle age right and so now what am I doing right, I mean I i’ve got down to five k’s of i’m going to be running here in the next couple of months.
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Jason Mefford: Right now, am I ready for it, yet no right and and honestly i’ve been sedentary for so long that I can’t just go out and run like I used to run right like it hurt myself, I mean my body doesn’t want to move that way so right now i’m just walking.
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Jason Mefford: By just going for a half an hour walk each day.
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Jason Mefford: Telling myself, I am a runner.
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Jason Mefford: yeah we’re going to get to that it here in just a second when we talk more about the subconscious stuff but.
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Jason Mefford: But it’s just that little step anybody can do some simple things.
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Jason Mefford: That will provide some benefit anyway.
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yeah.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And I think it’s also less about you, yes, you want to get to that five key, but the fact that you’re just taking the step now to work towards that is amazing.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And the other thing is like you know the older we get we actually are supposed to be increasing activity level not decreasing right we’ve been we’ve been conditioned and taught completely backwards right by our society.
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Jason Mefford: Well, and it’s and it’s funny because you know, as I was, I kind of made that decision i’m going to do it, I kind of picked a date a couple months out knowing again, I mean five K, I used to run those like 14 minutes right that was like.
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Ashrita Tiwari: wow I.
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Jason Mefford: can’t do that anymore.
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Jason Mefford: But I don’t have to write but but I said something out and then, as I was talking to my wife about it, she said.
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Jason Mefford: I said yeah you know there’s there’s a bunch of stuff around the holidays, but I don’t think i’m going to quite be ready for that and she’s like well why not, you can always walk it’s a run walk and i’m like.
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Jason Mefford: Well, of course, even if I can’t run.
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Jason Mefford: The whole time I could still sign up and run what I can and walk what I can.
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Jason Mefford: You know it’s it’s it’s a matter of us just kind of changing some of those stories, but we can do it and it’s worth it for us to take the time so don’t don’t tell myself I don’t have time for it make time for it right.
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Jason Mefford: But I wanted to go back to what you were talking about a little bit from your from your childhood, because I think this is going to tie well into some of this.
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Jason Mefford: clearing of your subconscious fears and some of the other things that you’re helping people with that I know we all deal with which is.
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Jason Mefford: You know, you were talking about your your parents in some of the things that they had gone through and realize that you know this was kind of a subconscious driver.
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Jason Mefford: behind you wanting to get more into fitness right and and and so that was a way that it that it kind of help or drove you, and it seems like.
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Jason Mefford: there’s there’s that instance where again there’s probably usually some subconscious reasons why we want to not be like our parents.
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Jason Mefford: But on the flip side other people think oh I can’t change I can’t be any different than my parents right.
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Jason Mefford: And so you know it seems like there’s subconscious things either holding us back or propelling us and we don’t even realize it right.
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Jason Mefford: And, and so much of the time we end up kind of sabotaging ourselves because there is some subconscious thing that’s that’s there so maybe let’s let’s kind of talk about that a little bit, because I know you have a background in hypnotherapy i’ve been doing it for a while.
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Jason Mefford: Not as as a as a person who, who has benefited from it right because i’m not a hypnotherapist, but I understand you know a lot of the power of the subconscious so let’s kind of get in and talk about that, because, as I said, you know I think a lot of people.
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Jason Mefford: They get frustrated they get down on themselves, they beat themselves up because they think you know damn it why, why can I not change my life, why can I not do what I want to do.
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Jason Mefford: and often there’s something subconscious that needs to be addressed.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah absolutely so yeah I mean.
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Ashrita Tiwari: lot of people are like that right, a lot of people are asking themselves why they can’t change, and one thing I do want to say is that i’m like.
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Ashrita Tiwari: don’t beat yourself up about it right, because I work with clients now and they tend to be like well why can’t I change this even though knowing this information, why can’t I change it.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And if you really think about it right, like many of us have been conditioned.
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Ashrita Tiwari: For years, right to think a specific way and believe a certain thing, and so, in order for us to reprogram that it’s going to take some time it’s going to take some consistency it’s going to take that we have some grapes for ourself.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And so I want people to understand that.
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Ashrita Tiwari: The reason that they’re probably self sabotaging or they’re into self doubt or they have these fears it’s it’s because they they’ve learned this unconsciously, without knowing.
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Ashrita Tiwari: This is how they’re supposed to be right, and so we have we do have to be kind to ourselves because, like when I started doing this work right a couple of years ago, I had these set of.
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Ashrita Tiwari: These beliefs and ways of being that I had learned over like 30 plus years of my life, so I couldn’t expect myself to change this overnight right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: So that’s one thing that I do want to start with, in saying that, like you have to be kind to yourself, when you’re doing this work.
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Ashrita Tiwari: With the subconscious reprogramming because it’s been something that’s.
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Ashrita Tiwari: been in our subconscious mind for most of our lives, and on top of that, prior to our life so meaning your parents have carried these beliefs right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Your your ancestors have carried asleep, so we really have to be kind to ourselves when we start thinking about like why isn’t this working fast enough right um.
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Ashrita Tiwari: But back to what you were saying.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Really, and I know how I don’t know how much you’ve shared about the subconscious mind here, but the way that I look at subconscious reprogramming is.
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Ashrita Tiwari: it’s really a way for us to tap into our potential right, we always hear people say oh my gosh as a human, we have so much potential human potential all of that right you hear that a lot.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And when you really get into your subconscious mind and start rewiring those those ingrained beliefs that were not even aware of and those those emotions right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: We start to really tap into the potential that we do have as humans and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Our brain right our brain 90% of our brain is our our subconscious mind and 10% of our brain is our conscious mind right, so our subconscious mind is where.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Where all of our beliefs, our emotions are frayed our spirituality is also there.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And it’s also the part of our brain that allows me to breathe, right now, without thinking about it right, it allows my.
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Ashrita Tiwari: My heart to pump without me thinking about it my lungs are pumping without me thinking about right there’s a whole world inside every human body that’s being controlled by the subconscious mind that we’re not even aware of right because.
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Ashrita Tiwari: that’s that’s the type of like power that we actually have and people don’t realize it.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And, and so, when we’re tapping into the subconscious mind it’s really a focus state of awareness and it’s a way for us to really.
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Ashrita Tiwari: reprogram some of those beliefs, that are ingrained in our mind and bring them up.
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Ashrita Tiwari: and show like why maybe you’re into self sabotage behaviors right why maybe these certain fears keep coming up so, for example, my clients that I work with.
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Ashrita Tiwari: They have a lot of anxiety and fears that come up when it comes to being seen and heard in their business.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And the reason that that’s coming up is because it’s in their subconscious mind and these fears.
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Ashrita Tiwari: have been there for a really long time, and most of the time it has nothing really to do even with their business right it’s more around their own beliefs and their emotions and the way that they think about themselves and feel about themselves so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: So yes, the subconscious programming is super powerful and um.
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Ashrita Tiwari: that’s one thing that I realized, when I was a personal trainer right, I was doing a lot of habits work.
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Ashrita Tiwari: With my clients and my clients were coming to me because they wanted to lose weight right and many of my clients would lose weight I would give them the program i’ll give them the nutrition plan I would give them the mindset even right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And they would be able to lose the 10 pounds, but then a couple weeks later, or maybe a couple months later.
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Ashrita Tiwari: They will regain those that wait and so, for me, I was like okay there’s something that’s not sticking here right and I knew it was.
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Ashrita Tiwari: When I once I started to learn about subconscious reprogramming that it was because their beliefs right they still have these beliefs about themselves.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And about being overweight right and they still have this identity that they’re carrying around about themselves that isn’t actually helping them keep that weight off, and so a lot of this work is around.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Our beliefs, our emotions, but it’s also around looking into identity right and looking at how do we actually see ourselves right so, for example, when I When I entered a.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I don’t know if you’re not but, if you remember, but I did my first bodybuilding competition last year right and it took me a while to get there, and I really had to reprogram my mind.
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Ashrita Tiwari: To see myself already as someone who’s a bodybuilder who’s on stage right it took me a really long time and I had to really dig into my beliefs and dig into.
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Ashrita Tiwari: The thoughts that I was having around myself about becoming a bodybuilder so I don’t know if that answers your question, but that that’s that’s a little bit of that work and and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And for self sabotage right it’s the same thing, so I know a lot of people who will like get into binge eating right binge eating as a thing and that’s The thing that actually I personally struggled with years ago.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And it wasn’t until I started doing subconscious reprogramming and really looking at why certain emotions kept coming up for me.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Were they looking at that emotions and why it was coming up for me and start really shifting that that’s when I started was able to overcome binge eating as well, but really are you know are.
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Ashrita Tiwari: You are you probably talk about this Jason right like our thoughts.
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Ashrita Tiwari: will lead to how we feel right and how we feel comes from our beliefs and our beliefs kind of causes our behavior right like how we behave in the world, and so we have to be really careful with that and it comes down straight to like pretty much our thoughts and our beliefs.
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Jason Mefford: yeah want to think it’s interesting because, as you were talking there there, so you know you talked about the 10% 90% you know, to get depends on who you talk to some people say 10% some say 5%.
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Jason Mefford: You know, whatever right What it means is that you know there’s a there’s a misconception out there because i’ve heard this from a lot of people, we only use 10% of our brain, we only use 5% of our brain nope we use 100% of our brain, but only five to 10% of our brain processing is conscious.
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Jason Mefford: Right right so it’s it’s me sitting here going oh i’m looking at my hand oh i’m looking at the street i’m.
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Jason Mefford: i’m talking to her i’m sitting in my office right it’s our that conscious part of our brain is only represents five to 10% so.
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Jason Mefford: You know, for people that are are having trouble procrastinating you know or or have some of these different fears or anxiety that come up.
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Jason Mefford: for you to sit there and think that five to 10% of your brain and your conscious willpower of sitting here going i’m going to go outside and go for a walk i’m going to go right.
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Jason Mefford: That that consciousness.
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Jason Mefford: will never be the 90%.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah right.
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Jason Mefford: And and that’s why you know a lot of these different tools to help us access in reprogram the subconscious are so powerful right because it’s literally like you’re going in and changing the computer code in your brain.
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Jason Mefford: Right, exactly, and I think that’s probably one of the reasons why you got into into hypnotherapy as well right so so maybe maybe talk a little bit about that or how that.
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Jason Mefford: How that kind of works, a little bit too because, again I know i’ve talked about it a lot in some other podcasts and other places, but maybe not so much on this particular one.
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Jason Mefford: yeah what it is, because that word typically scares people.
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Jason Mefford: yeah there’s nothing to be scared about.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah so um so really when I go through a hypnosis session with my clients all i’m really doing is i’m taking them through a series of exercises to relax their mind right because we live in.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Such a crazy chaotic world that’s always telling us to go go go and do do do that people have like most people, especially for high achiever right they become so conditioned.
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Ashrita Tiwari: To like being in high alert and what i’ve noticed also is that most of my clients don’t even know how to breathe properly right because.
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Ashrita Tiwari: they’re just in this constant go go go they don’t even they’re not even breathing properly right, and so, with my hypnosis what I do is I help them relax their mind right and it’s really just.
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Ashrita Tiwari: When I when I help them relax what i’m doing is i’m helping them slow down their brainwave state right and they’re going.
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Ashrita Tiwari: From there going from Alpha and theta state, so what we’re doing is we we passed the conscious mind and access the subconscious mind by slowing down your brainwave state.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And when we do that that’s when our subconscious mind is actually open to receiving whatever we’re telling it right, and for many people, the work that I do.
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Ashrita Tiwari: In hypnosis is around self worth self love right habits, our life is created by our habits right, so we really focus on the habits that we have.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And for some people there’s a lot of work that they need to do from their childhood right so we’ll do a lot of inner child work.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And then we’ll do a lot of future future work as well, like seeing your future self and so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: really what we’re doing is we’re just helping people get into a commerce state so similar to meditation right a lot of people I know that’s more popular now.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And people are scared by that so it’s similar process right, but now we’re just getting them into a certain brainwave state where they’re open to receiving.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Whatever i’m telling them because the thing is our subconscious mind is is is most open when we do that, however, our subconscious mind is always it’s always on right, so what I mean by that is like.
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Ashrita Tiwari: We might like we might not be consciously processing something, but our subconscious mind is always processing it right from billboards to whatever watching on TV sounds all over the place.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Maybe if you’re with friends friends saying things that may be consciously you’re like oh that’s not a big deal, but then it goes into your subconscious mind right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: So our subconscious mind is literally processing all the time, like you said and super powerful and so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: When we bring them into just a relaxed state we’re just kind of opening that up more and we’re giving it new thoughts and beliefs, that are actually going to empower my clients.
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Ashrita Tiwari: and actually help them build new habits and help them develop a better relationship with themselves right um.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And so I don’t know if that answers your question a little bit, but yeah it’s really so and I know there’s a lot of misconception right like people think that.
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Ashrita Tiwari: You know when you’re in a in hypnosis you lose control like none of that happens right you’re in full control you’ll never lose control.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And there’s a lot of misconception from the media around like stage hypnosis there is such thing called stage hypnosis.
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Ashrita Tiwari: But even with stage hypnosis we’re still have full control right you’re not losing control over what you’re doing your body and your emotions, you can have full control through that so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: it’s really just a place for us to tap into your subconscious mind and rewire those thoughts right because.
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Ashrita Tiwari: So many of us live in a world where or in our minds, I would say that, like it’s always negative and our brain loves to focus on the negative right like.
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Ashrita Tiwari: How many times have you been given a really good compliments from people and there’s that one person, maybe that doesn’t give you a good compliment and all you do is focus on that.
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Ashrita Tiwari: That negative compliment right or that negative comment comment For those of you who have businesses.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And, and so our brain loves to focus on the negative so in the hypnosis session what we’re doing is we’re really.
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Ashrita Tiwari: slowing down allowing me to relax right because our natural state is actually to be relaxed it’s not to be hyper.
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Ashrita Tiwari: You know hyper intense and breathing like shallow breathing, which is something that I noticed that a lot of people in our world today.
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Ashrita Tiwari: They don’t breathe properly and that wasn’t the case for me, too, because I started to do some breath work and I was like oh I can’t even hold my breath for that long right I can’t even hold it in and out for that long.
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Ashrita Tiwari: um so yeah it’s really just a session to like focus on what are the beliefs, that you want to have, what are the thoughts that you want to have right, and how are these thoughts and beliefs, are going to how are they going to empower you to.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Whatever goal, you have whether it’s losing weight, whether it’s having a successful business, whatever it is that you’re you’re looking to do.
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Jason Mefford: yeah and I think it’s you know it’s interesting as your as you’re kind of going through that because, again, I mean for me that’s been doing this for years.
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Jason Mefford: I understand I understand how the brain works and trying to do that, but like you said it’s it’s slowing down our brain waves.
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Jason Mefford: But I know a lot of people are still a little hesitant or they’re like well I could never be hypnotized or that wouldn’t work on me, or you know, whatever else but you know again it’s like how many how many times have you been sitting there, and you kind of zone out.
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Jason Mefford: you’re listening to music or I mean I do this, all the time, where i’m.
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Jason Mefford: i’m sitting there i’m listening to music i’m in a certain headspace right in fact there’s actually a meditation APP called headspace, I think, for that reason right.
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Jason Mefford: But i’m in a certain headspace and all of a sudden my wife will say something to me and it’s like she’s pulling me out of asleep almost like.
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Jason Mefford: I know she’s talking to me, but I have no idea what she’s saying, right now, I have to like pull myself back out and kind of go Okay, can you say that again because I didn’t get that right.
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Jason Mefford: Because during the day we all right get into some trance like States during the day when we’re watching movies, when we’re doing.
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Jason Mefford: You know, different things like that we tend to get into that phase already it’s just you know, being able to either put ourselves there by using something like meditation or some other tech breathing techniques.
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Jason Mefford: or doing something like a hypnotherapy session, which is just a lot quicker right.
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Jason Mefford: and being able to get you down.
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Jason Mefford: And then have the help of somebody else going in there and rewriting the program which is, which is why I gave the little hand before if everybody was listening right when i’m walking and when I am.
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Jason Mefford: You know, quietly relaxing one of the things that i’m saying to myself, is, I am a runner.
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Jason Mefford: Yes, I am a runner I am a runner and i’ve you know, again, I had a little medical procedure done so I can’t I can’t work out.
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Jason Mefford: You know, for another week or so until that’s all done, but I can still go for a walk and what’s The interesting thing is.
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Jason Mefford: You know i’ve been telling myself this regularly for a week or two, and even though i’m holding myself back i’m still just walking you know again for another week I can feel myself as i’m walking like my body just wants to start running.
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Jason Mefford: Which is it’s kind of weird because again by doing that i’m i’m reprogramming myself that I am a runner I am a runner I am a runner and so at that identity or belief level i’m starting to believe it.
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Jason Mefford: So much so that my body.
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Jason Mefford: yeah is seeing itself or wanting to physically take off, besides me me just going through it in my mind.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah so and our subconscious mind is so smart right like it remembers because you used to be a runner.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Was remembers that and, on top of that, we have muscle on them as well right, so I think when you start writing you’ll be surprised at how much easier it is, and you actually think um so that’s just something I wanted to put out there for you.
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Jason Mefford: know it will be like I said, if I hadn’t had this little medical procedure last week, I would have.
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Jason Mefford: Already, probably been out there going and and and it’s like you said it’s the muscle memory once once we’re used to doing anything whenever we stop it’s so much easier to get on and go again right and that’s that’s why there’s the you know.
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Jason Mefford: You already know how to ride a bike ride, even though you haven’t ridden a bike and in forever, you can just get on a bike and you just start writing again right yeah.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Exactly yeah for sure for sure yeah and I love that I love that you’re telling yourself that you’re a runner already right, even though right now you’re not able to run you’re already.
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Ashrita Tiwari: you’re already like letting your subconscious mind know like this is the identity that I have for myself, and this is this is, who I am right and so that is really, really powerful because.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I think that a lot of times, people are like well I can’t really say I am that thing until I do it.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And that’s not always the case, you can start telling yourself, like, for example, before I got on stage I was already telling myself i’m on stage right, I already started, even on my hypnosis I really started visualizing myself.
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Ashrita Tiwari: On stage and doing my walk and being really confident and what I ended up doing my bodybuilding competition it actually turned out to be the exact thing that I actually visualize in my some kind of what I was doing my subconscious reprogramming which I thought was super powerful.
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Ashrita Tiwari: So you don’t actually have to also wait until you do that thing for you to start.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Working on that that internal work that’s what I like to say right so even with a lot of my a lot of the coaches, that I work with right, some of them haven’t even had any clients yet like they haven’t.
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Ashrita Tiwari: enrolled any new clients, but they’re already work doing this work to step into this identity as a coach as someone who’s helping clients and they’re already doing that internal work and many times.
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Ashrita Tiwari: What happens is because they’ve done this work, the subconscious reprogramming work it’s so much easier for them once they’re ready to get the client.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Work on this business right and just do the things that they need to do, whereas a lot of times.
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Ashrita Tiwari: What I see is that there’s a lot of people in business, who haven’t done this internal work.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And they might make it far right to certain extent, but they hit they hit like the ceiling, because they haven’t done that actual internal work and so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: That internal work what i’m saying is doesn’t start in the beginning, it like it’s an ongoing thing, no matter where you are in your business as well.
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yeah.
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Jason Mefford: Well, so you know because I know we we kind of talked about at the beginning, right those things that kind of I mean, these are some things that we all, you know we all have fears we all find ourselves, sometimes procrastinating you know feeling like we have to be perfect at everything.
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Jason Mefford: right before will do anything I mean again that’s.
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Jason Mefford: that’s crazy right that’s like me saying well unless unless I could be a world class marathoner i’m not even going to go out and run.
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Jason Mefford: Right it’s like everything has to start from somewhere The self doubt the overwhelm that so many of us end up feeling Ray so so I guess you know.
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Jason Mefford: Most people that are listening have felt some of that right so so what’s your what’s your advice to them, and maybe we can kind of give them some some tactical you know tip kind of thing to just start trying or doing something different.
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Jason Mefford: This week, I mean besides reaching out to you or therapist and having a session yeah what’s what’s something they can even start.
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Jason Mefford: Today, you know as soon as they finish listening to this.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah so I mean a lot of that you know that self doubt and the fears are coming from from your brain right they’re coming from literally your brain thinks it’s in danger.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And it’s on survival mode and so what I would recommend is start looking within right um and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: see if we can slow down and start asking and getting clear on one of the thoughts that i’m having right like it’s because your thoughts are leading to your emotions.
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Ashrita Tiwari: and your emotions it’s your behavior so you want to start slowing down.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And because many times I know we live in such a crazy world that we many people don’t even have the time to slow down, so I would recommend first just like carving out time.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Just to be with yourself, maybe just be with yourself for like 1015 minutes.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And, especially in moments when you’re feeling that stuff out when that anxiety is creeping in.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I want you to really start slowing down and asking yourself Okay, what are the thoughts that i’m having right now right and asking yourself like are these thoughts actually true because.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Most of the time these thoughts are not going to be true right like it’s going to be stories that we’ve created in our minds.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And what you can start doing right is once you ask and you’ll probably find that the stories aren’t true right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And it start reframing those those thoughts, so how can you reframe those thoughts for it to actually work for you, rather than it cause more anxiety right because that’s what often happens is we go into this negative spiral.
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Ashrita Tiwari: About whatever it is we’re we’re thinking about and it’s kind of keeps going and going and we’re not really it’s harder for us to come on to that, so we can start catching ourselves like when we’re starting to feel the anxiety creep in and and first thing I do think when it comes to.
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Ashrita Tiwari: anxiety and understanding your emotions, you want to first understand where in your body you’re feeling the emotion right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And that’s how you can identify like i’m an anxiety so, for example when i’m in anxiety, I know that my my chest gets really tight right and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I tend to talk really fast that’s how i’ll know like okay i’m in anxiety.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And i’ll stop and i’ll just just first of all, just remind myself hey i’m good like i’m safe and nothing’s wrong i’m not in danger right because that’s that’s our brain telling us, we might be in danger.
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Ashrita Tiwari: When we when we feel like anxiety come up and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: As soon as I noticed that I asked myself Okay, what did what was I just thinking about and I just get clear on that, and then I just reframe it I just reframe it and look at it and really ask myself isn’t actually true.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And usually, when when I go through that process, and I do this process honestly like almost every day, like, I have a process for myself to check in with myself around are these thoughts actually true or not, if I especially if i’m feeling anxious.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And I just reframe them I just reframe them to something else that’s going to actually empower me and most of the time that helps.
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Ashrita Tiwari: um and another simple tool right is literally, and this is going to sign this might be a little cheesy for some people, but I literally put my hand on my heart.
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Ashrita Tiwari: and actually there’s studies done on this, that the that just putting a hand on your heart actually calms your nervous system down right.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And it’s going to end just breathe and I just remind myself hey i’m okay i’m loved and i’m safe.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And I just repeat that, sometimes, especially if I don’t have the moment to maybe like look at my thoughts and reframe them right if i’m in a place where I can’t do that I just put my hand on my heart.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And I just breathe and I just say i’m loved i’m okay and everything’s gonna be fine right you don’t have to use that exact phrase, but whatever is going to work for you.
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Ashrita Tiwari: But it’s really just a reminder to your brain telling you that you know you’re not in danger right because that’s what our human brain does our brain will that’s that’s what it does it’s likes to just tell us when we’re in danger, so that that is always a helpful tool for me.
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Ashrita Tiwari: in regards to just helping with self doubt when the self doubt creeps in or when there’s any self sabotage behaviors that i’m going into right because usually the self sabotage those behaviors are.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Our is after I have a series of thoughts and emotions right, and then I get into that behavior so it’s always looking back.
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Ashrita Tiwari: and seeing what are the thoughts that i’m having and identifying like wearing your body, the emotion that’s coming, and I would say that.
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Ashrita Tiwari: is probably going to be the most powerful thing for people to do first is identify like when i’m in anxiety how where did, where do I feel it.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Because that helps you know, because sometimes you know because we’re an autopilot it’s hard for us to know exactly what the thoughts are right, some of us like.
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Ashrita Tiwari: When I work with my clients i’m like okay let’s talk about the thoughts that you’re having they’re like I don’t know what the thoughts are i’m like okay let’s let’s let’s feel it out, then we’re in your body, are you feeling it right so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: I think that could be an easier place for a lot of people that haven’t really done this, this thought work and dove into the stories, because that can be a little bit harder, especially for people that just aren’t exposed to this.
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Jason Mefford: yeah well so some good good takeaways and a good way to kind of end up, you know as far as.
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Jason Mefford: Some practical things for people to do so again just kind of as a little recap, because again go back and listen to the whole thing you can because there was a lot of stuff that came out in here right so.
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Jason Mefford: Why don’t we talked about at the beginning, related to you know your health and even some exercise.
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Jason Mefford: And the whole idea of.
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Jason Mefford: You know even doing something even like doing a little bit of walking helps you to calm down to be more focused as well too right.
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Jason Mefford: And you know when it comes to some of the stuff here at the end you know when you start when you notice yourself thinking a certain way right to kind of stop and see how, how are you feeling in your body.
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Jason Mefford: And kind of shift your story around that.
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Jason Mefford: And I love the one about just your hand over your heart.
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Jason Mefford: right that again it’s a it’s a just taking that time for yourself whether it’s just for a few seconds literally 1530 seconds, or if it’s just sitting quietly for five minutes 10 minutes, whatever it is anything that we do right is a little.
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Jason Mefford: Little something.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah.
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Jason Mefford: For sure it just takes a little something.
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Jason Mefford: Right and and I guess don’t don’t fall into the trap that we talked about at the beginning of oh I don’t have time for that.
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Jason Mefford: Well, do you really can you afford not.
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Jason Mefford: To take the time.
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Jason Mefford: To do it.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Right yeah for sure for sure, and like you know stress and anxiety is such a big thing for people, especially now and.
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Ashrita Tiwari: That is also many studies are finding that like fat is what causes a lot of illness and health complications right so back to health and thinking about anxiety and stress like they’re kind of all interconnected so.
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Ashrita Tiwari: um so like Jason said it’s so important to just think about this as something that’s going to add to your life, rather than take away right people like to think that oh I don’t have time is going to take away from my time, but it’s like.
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Ashrita Tiwari: How can you change the perspective and think how can I, what can I gain from actually adding and you know 1530 minute walk and for myself to breathe and just really look within myself and seeing what, what are the thoughts that are coming up, what are the emotions that are coming up.
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Jason Mefford: yeah yeah because, again, most of these things that are holding us back the reason they’re holding you back is because it’s subconscious.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Right.
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Jason Mefford: Right slow down.
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Jason Mefford: Right slow your brain down slow yourself down and try to figure out what it is use some of these tools and techniques that is treated as talked about, because it does it makes makes all the difference.
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Absolutely.
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Jason Mefford: Because i’m sure we’ve got enough stress and everything else in life that any little thing that you can do to reduce that even by a little bit.
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Jason Mefford: How much better is your life, going to be as a result of that.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Right absolutely.
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Jason Mefford: So let’s create a thanks for coming on you know people want to reach out to you learn more about you work with you how’s the best way for people to get Ahold of you.
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Ashrita Tiwari: yeah, so I do have a website it’s treated to worry calm so it’s a ch ri ta ta w ri calm and if you just want to show me a message I have an instagram page, as well as ch ri ta underscore coach co a ch.
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sweet.
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Jason Mefford: Well, thank you, my friend for coming on I learn more about you, too, which is.
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Jason Mefford: Always one of the things that I love about.
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Jason Mefford: Doing this as well, and you got good stuff helping people, and I know you helped a lot of people that are listening to this today, too, so thank you, thank you, thank you.
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Ashrita Tiwari: Thank you Jason I loved it I loved learning about you as well, and you’re running.
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Jason Mefford: Which you’re going to do I know you’re going to hear you’ll see me posting some things about some of the five k’s because that was.
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Jason Mefford: That was, as I went back and thought about it before.
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Jason Mefford: That was one of the things that that was a way to kick myself in the butt to get it done is to actually just put it on the calendar pay the registration fee show you know get my ass there.
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Ashrita Tiwari: And for me.
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Jason Mefford: yeah it always worked for me and actually I used to run a lot of them with my son when he was little.
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Jason Mefford: as well, so yeah I just gotta.
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Jason Mefford: just get back good.
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Jason Mefford: All right, well, thank you again welcome.
