In today’s episode of #jammingwithjason we speak with Jen Stillion who has been a performer and dance educator for many years.
Jen is here to talk with us about helpful ways that we can get out of our own heads and stop sweating the small stuff.
Whether you’re looking to become a better leader, spouse, executive or whatever, dance is a great way to enjoy yourself and be your own authentic person while removing your own fears and blockages that have been holding you back in life.
If this episode resonated with you go ahead and connect with Jen on Instagram @jenstillion
Listen in at: http://www.jasonmefford.com/jammingwithjason211/
Get a VIP backstage pass and behind the scenes information when you sign up for The Jamming with Jason newsletter: https://bit.ly/3k53OjS
And a big benefit of listening here on my website, is access to the video too 🙂
Transcript
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Jason Mefford: Welcome to another episode of jamming with Jason hey today I have my good friend Jen Stilion with me and you know we talk sometimes about getting out of our head.
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Jason Mefford: and give you some different tools in order to do that right, because sometimes we just ruminate over and over and over again and it’s like how do I get out of my head, how do I stop thinking.
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Jason Mefford: and Jan is one of those people that helps people get out of their head and get out of some of the self doubt so.
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Jason Mefford: i’m excited to have Jen on with me so whatever you do make sure and listen to this whole episode in fact this is probably one of those episodes you might want to listen to more than once.
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Jason Mefford: And you’re probably after you listen going to want to share it with all of your friends and family so with that let’s roll out episode.
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Jen Stillion: eight.
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Chad.
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Jason Mefford: You doing my friend.
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Like I.
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Jason Mefford: figured there’s gonna be a little chair dancing there’s gonna be a little fun here because you’re one of those people that kind of like lights up the room.
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Jason Mefford: And one of the reasons why I love you and what you do, but it’s.
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Jason Mefford: So so maybe just just just spend a minute just kind of telling people you know kind of what you do, how you.
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Jason Mefford: help people come out of some of this overthinking and self doubt because.
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Jason Mefford: You know I know your business is transitioning a little bit, but you’ve helped you’ve helped people do this, a lot, you know how how have you done that.
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Jason Mefford: And then we’ll we’ll get in and we’ll see where it goes and probably talk about some different you know tactical things people can take away and actually start practicing this week as well, but let everybody know a little bit about you.
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Jen Stillion: Well, thank you so much for having me here Jason and yeah so basically, what I do, I have been a performer and a dancer and dance educator for many years.
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Jen Stillion: And I have you know studied dance and dance has you know my practice with dance has deepened and you know i’ve discovered that dance is such a powerful powerful tool.
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Jen Stillion: to really get you out of your head to get you out of all the head garbage all the overthinking all the self doubt.
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Jen Stillion: And it helps you get you out of the future, the future stuff that we get attached to future fears or whatnot that can cause you to overthink and cause you to doubt yourself.
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Jen Stillion: or get you out of the past right, so it gets you in the moment.
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Jen Stillion: And i’ve helped a lot of people get out of that and be with themselves and be in the moment so anything that I do you know i’m a speaker so if I go in front of a large audience or.
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Jen Stillion: Whether it’s on stage or these days it’s a lot with zoom you know I get people up and moving.
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Jen Stillion: And i’m talking about corporate peeps i’m talking about all different kinds of audience that they’re like what I have to get up and move and dance yes.
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Jen Stillion: Everything I do you know, and I talked about lots of different things.
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Jen Stillion: But dancing is a tool that I use everywhere, I go, because every single person has dance one time in their life, whether it’s at a wedding or a club or a party.
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Jen Stillion: You know you get up the music’s pumping you get out there, whether you think you’re a good dancer or not, and before you know what you’re having fun you’re half five and your friends, you know your favorite song comes on.
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Jen Stillion: And you’re out of your head you’re in the moment, and you are having so much fun that you’re not thinking about all the stressors and crap in your head.
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Jen Stillion: So this is why, specifically, I mean, I have a lot of tools that I give to my you know clients, but dancing is a really powerful one that I use, so this is how I help people I do one on one sessions.
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Jen Stillion: You know I speak, and you know i’m just passionate about life and dance is one of the things that has helped me get there.
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Jason Mefford: yeah well and and I think, because you know again you work with people that get in their head a lot.
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Jason Mefford: I do too.
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Jason Mefford: Right it’s.
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Jason Mefford: You know it’s that whole idea of past present future right if we think about those three different areas, and most of the time when we’re overthinking we’re either regretting or feeling shame about things that happened in the past or or anxious or we’re fearful.
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Jason Mefford: about things in the future.
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Jason Mefford: Right those those tend to be the two areas right where we’re just like.
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Jason Mefford: ruminating over and over and over in our head right it’s like oh my gosh what’s going to happen what’s this person going to do, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah right and to stay stuck in your head there you can kind of go a little crazy right.
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Jason Mefford: yeah and and so having tools like dance which, which you know I think is is fascinating and amazing I mean I sociology and psychology is like fascinating for me right, and if you think about.
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Jason Mefford: Any any civilization any any group go back to you know tribal nature any anything like that every organization or every every iteration of civilization has music and they have dance.
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Jason Mefford: Right and and I think there’s a reason for that, and especially now, you know in our society, we we kind of get out of that right, we might listen listen to some music, but how much are we actually.
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Jason Mefford: dancing and freeing ourselves right because to me that’s where it, you know i’m not a great dancer your professional dancer i’m just like this.
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Jason Mefford: awkward white guy you know.
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Jason Mefford: But it’s like you know.
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Jason Mefford: dances not just about like a formality either right so so maybe we can talk about that a little bit you know, because when I was in college, one of my PE classes was ballroom dancing.
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Jen Stillion: right that I took yeah I can I can I can actually do a wall, so I could chop shop, you know and do some things like that.
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Jason Mefford: But, for me, even then, I would I would I would overthink in my head right it’s like one to catch a child right and so i’m sitting here like trying to count the steps and everything, instead of just releasing can being in the moment right.
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Jason Mefford: So, so, but so maybe let’s let’s let’s talk about that a little bit what.
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Jason Mefford: What is dance, can I dance when I may even in my chair sitting here at work.
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Jen Stillion: Yes.
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Jen Stillion: I can.
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Jen Stillion: let’s allow yes.
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Jen Stillion: that’s The thing is that there’s these beliefs that you’re carrying about dance, because what blocks people from just moving.
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Jen Stillion: Their body is because they get stuck in their head, you know, telling them so whether or not getting it right or wrong, whether or not i’m a good dancer or a bad dancer.
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Jen Stillion: Again, your second your head, but when you’re you know, making a meal and you’re cooking in the kitchen you’re listening to your fun at song and also you break out and you’re moving.
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Jen Stillion: And then your partner comes in your kids coming in coming in the you know the room and they’re starting dancing you’re not thinking about whether or not you’re a good dancer.
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Jen Stillion: Because dancing helps you get out of your head, as we said, but it gets you into the feeling so it’s not a matter of you getting the steps right it’s how you feel.
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Jen Stillion: it’s getting into that you know into your body into your intuition.
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Jen Stillion: And when you get out of that and every single one of us listening have been there, you know when i’m talking about going back to the dance floor at a wedding or a club or in your kitchen or dancing having a dance party with your family.
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Jen Stillion: You don’t care like kids are the best examples, because they don’t care what anybody thinks a song comes on and they just move.
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Jen Stillion: You know, and you can do this in your car, you know i’ve done a lot of car dancing favorite song comes on you’re rolling down the windows are like hey and you’re totally getting into it so yeah you could dance in your chair, you can do anything you want.
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Jason Mefford: Because it’s it’s it’s about that it’s like you said there’s no right or wrong way to do it.
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Jason Mefford: yeah right.
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Jason Mefford: yeah and I know we just with my wife and I we just rewatch wayne’s world.
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Jason Mefford: And there’s a there’s a great scene in wayne’s world you know when Bohemian rhapsody come.
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Jason Mefford: out there in the car right and so again, I mean you can’t get up and move around, but.
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Jason Mefford: But their their chair dance in their car dance, and you know at that point and it’s.
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Jason Mefford: You know, again there’s no right way to do it it’s like no, you must you know bob’s your head three times you know forward and then to the right it’s about.
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Jason Mefford: You know, and this is, this is where, again, I still have stories and beliefs around dancing right and that i’m releasing right because my first wife told me, I was a bad dancer so I never danced right.
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Jason Mefford: But it’s but it’s the it’s the whole idea of freeing yourself and opening yourself up right and and I think like you said you know we worry about Am I getting it wrong.
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Jason Mefford: But when we do that we’re in our head and was the story that we’re telling herself is, oh no if I do it wrong people aren’t people are going to laugh at me.
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Jason Mefford: exactly right, so how did, how did people kind of get past that because I know there’s probably people that are like yeah but you know if I if I just start moving really funny everybody’s gonna look at me like i’m weird.
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Right.
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Jen Stillion: Well, this is the beautiful thing about dance is first and foremost dances the most vulnerable form of movement form of exercise because you’re showing your whole body to the world.
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Jen Stillion: And there’s a lot of stories about your body and so you’re showing yourself to everybody.
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Jen Stillion: And dance is such a it’s a huge metaphor for life, it teaches you so many lessons, just like the story that was put on you about you, being a bad dancer like.
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Jen Stillion: So many people have that kind of story, like, I was told I was a bad dancer I can’t move this way I look, you know, like a robot whatever it is.
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Jason Mefford: Sometimes you want to look like a robot.
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Jen Stillion: robotic moves yeah yeah or I have two left feet i’ve heard it all and that’s the thing I mean Just imagine if you.
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Jen Stillion: You know, let go of the stories and just enjoy life and not be attached to what others think about you.
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Jen Stillion: that’s why dance had it’s like I have this this motto of who you are on the dance floor is who you are in life So how do you approach the dance floor or you will a hater.
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Jen Stillion: Are you somebody who’s like the music, you know goes on and you’re the first person out there.
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Jen Stillion: You know, do you hide behind your friends you don’t want everyone to kind of see how you moved you copy everybody else, I mean it’s such I mean dance each life, it really is, if you think about it.
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Jason Mefford: that’s it’s actually it’s.
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Jason Mefford: Because again all those insecurities.
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Jason Mefford: Maybe that we have.
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Jason Mefford: About dance or probably insecurities that are showing up in our life.
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Jason Mefford: as well, right now, which, which leads me to another point right as I kind of geek out here a little bit on this probably.
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Jason Mefford: that’s what I knew that’s what I do.
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Jason Mefford: Yes, so it’s the way it’s the way it’s the way I operate right is so so if if music is kind of that metaphor for life.
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Jason Mefford: And how how we actually show up in other parts of our life right like like you and i’ve heard Jim other people that you know say things like how you do one thing you do everything.
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Right.
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Jason Mefford: shout out to the great Jim 14 for that one right.
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Jason Mefford: that’s that’s again that’s one of those two by four things to my head.
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Jason Mefford: Of ooh man that’s that’s really true right so so if if we’re afraid to show up on the dance floor then we’re probably afraid to show up in other parts of our life as well.
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Jason Mefford: Right so so that’s probably going on is probably holding us back in some way.
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Jason Mefford: You know, and whether you realize it or not, you’re being held back.
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Jason Mefford: Because of some of these beliefs right so so there’s so many people that are like yeah but you know I want to do it different in these other parts of my life, I want to, I want to be a different you know partner different you know father, mother, whatever parent.
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Right.
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Jason Mefford: But, but they have a hard time showing up there, so so does this also mean that if we show up on the dance floor differently.
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Jason Mefford: And if we’re able to release some of those stories and just be our authentic self even for a few minutes as i’m dancing around the kitchen listening to dancing Queen.
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Jen Stillion: Because I will tell you that is one of those songs that you can’t listen.
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Jason Mefford: To move right.
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Jen Stillion: yep yep.
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Jason Mefford: So if if we can do that, even for just a few minutes does that actually help us in those other parts of our life to be a better partner to be a better parent to be a better.
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Jason Mefford: You know executive leader, whatever it happens to be can some of those little practice things that we do help us in those other areas.
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Jen Stillion: Oh absolutely absolutely you know when you are on the dance floor and there’s always that girl or guy who’s often their own corner.
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Jen Stillion: And they’re doing their whole thing they were doing their whole dance thing and they’re free and they don’t give a crap what people think whether they’re a good dancer or bad it doesn’t even matter.
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Jen Stillion: But it’s always that one person that stands out and I don’t know about you, but i’ve always admired that person because they don’t give a crap what people think, and when you watch them they’re enjoy.
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Jen Stillion: And that is one of the biggest benefit when you can tap into your authentic self and get out of all your head crap get out of your way.
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Jen Stillion: And you’re moving your body and you’re totally connected to Joy, you are connected to something higher than you’re connected to your higher self.
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Jen Stillion: And you are coming home to who you really are so if you can have doses of that yeah like imagine where it’s like what’s going to be like for you to show up in your relationships and your work and your job.
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Jen Stillion: You start to really become unblocked and move those walls that have kept you trapped of being insecure and kip and really caring what people think about you that’s really the number one I think fear.
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Jen Stillion: of why people think they’re a good dancer or a bad dancer or not, why they’re not fully you know becoming unleashed on the dance floor of life.
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Jason Mefford: yeah yeah because we’re afraid of the judgment.
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Jason Mefford: Of what other people are going to say now.
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Jen Stillion: You.
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Jason Mefford: Know again it’s like the pointing thing now right we think.
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Jen Stillion: We think.
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Jason Mefford: That we’re concerned about what other people think.
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Jason Mefford: But it’s not really that we’re concerned about how we think about ourselves, based on what other people think of us right and there’s a big difference.
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Jason Mefford: Right and sometimes that’s a bitter pill to swallow.
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Jen Stillion: yeah.
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Jason Mefford: as well to realize, you know it’s that self love.
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Jason Mefford: yeah, if you will, right and and and the fact that, like you said, I mean when you are.
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Jason Mefford: Especially today, we get taught that we, we need to control things and by controlling things you’re safe, but there is no real control there isn’t, it is an illusion of control and the more that we can free ourselves.
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Jason Mefford: And like you said actually be who we are, I think that’s a great way of describing it right it’s.
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Jason Mefford: yeah it’s like i’m we’re different people in different settings right, but the more we can just be with who we really are.
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Jason Mefford: Instead of trying to filter ourselves instead of trying to impress other people are doing these other things right that’s who I am that’s who I need to be more right and so so doing these now you know again i’m sure that.
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Jason Mefford: You know, as people are going to try this or like oh that’s kind of interesting Maybe I should go out and try dancing right well, probably the first thing you’re not going to do is go down to like the exclusive.
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Jason Mefford: dance Club in Hollywood.
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Jason Mefford: and go out on the dance floor right, I mean so So what are some ways that you kind of help people incorporate this or or try it out, because for me it’s it’s one of those things it’s like just try it out right.
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Jason Mefford: what’s the worst that can happen.
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Jen Stillion: yeah and if you are somebody who you know really works on yourself, and you have a bunch of tools that you use.
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Jen Stillion: You know this is just another tool to put in your toolkit and it just takes five minutes you know your favorite songs that gets you up and move in like you said dancing Queen.
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Jen Stillion: You know, find your favorite song put it on, and if you work at home or you have a break in your day where you need to shift, this is the thing about dancing and moving your body.
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Jen Stillion: It shifts you it shifts the energy when you feel stagnant when you feel a little bit tired when you feel like you’re, especially if you are.
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Jen Stillion: You know sinking into stress and anxiety, it is a major stress reliever.
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Jen Stillion: Because thing about anxiety stress stress and anxiety is that you are being so attached to the future fears of what’s going to happen two seconds from now.
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Jen Stillion: That you forget about who you are in the moment, so this is why moving your body and just getting up putting on your headphones and just dance your heart out give yourself the permission.
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Jen Stillion: If you’ve been told you’ve been a bad dancer if you think you are a bad dancer just get over it it’s not about that you were just with yourself.
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Jen Stillion: Just dance be in the moment and just go for it and that’s how that’s what I start with when I tell people what to do, it’s a tool that people use and they feel so much better about themselves.
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Jason Mefford: Well, and it’s one of those things that like you said it’s little I mean you can do it for one minute.
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Jason Mefford: yeah for five minutes you can do 10 minutes right and there’s.
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Jason Mefford: there’s also you know again because I I tell a lot of people because we’re we’re very sedentary.
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Jason Mefford: Now, in in in our lifestyle right, I mean I sit in this Chair for hours.
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Jason Mefford: At a time right but, but we all need to get up and move every so often and there’s there’s a reason you know, like you said it’s a hemisphere i’ll shift there’s literally by getting up and moving or doing something you end up kind of recalibrating your brain it’s like pause reset.
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Jason Mefford: And so you need to get up anyway, probably right research says that usually every 40 to 50 minutes you should get up in.
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Jason Mefford: Life a little bit.
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Jason Mefford: yep so if you’re going to get up and move a bit anyway, why not try it out.
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Jason Mefford: Right what’s the what’s the worst that could happen yep.
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Jason Mefford: You know you’ll feel a little awkward at first, so you know close your door, you know do it when nobody’s around right until you get more comfortable with it, but you know what’s the worst that could happen, but what’s the best that could happen as well right.
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Jason Mefford: And like you said I think probably everybody who is listening, has had some experience at some point in your life when you just felt free you felt that joy.
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Jason Mefford: You felt that happiness in it it’s it’s it literally is an endorphin rush and a bunch of other stuff too right but but you’ve felt that way before right and, since you felt that way before don’t you think you can feel that way again.
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Jen Stillion: yeah it’s a gift.
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Jason Mefford: it’s a gift and it’s in it’s one of the easy ways to do it right so worst case you feel a little awkward best case you just feel amazing.
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Jason Mefford: yeah for those few minutes.
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Jason Mefford: When you’re doing it.
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Jen Stillion: yeah and also, I want to say is that have you ever seen.
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Jen Stillion: Somebody who’s maybe not a great dancer but they’re so confident when they move that you just don’t even care about how they’re they’re moving because you seeing their confidence.
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Jen Stillion: you’re seeing their power and the reason why they’re powerful because they don’t care what people think they’re they’re up there dancing doing it for themselves and you’re like I want to be that person.
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Jen Stillion: And that’s what it’s about, and it is an it does open up amazing lessons, so if you’re starting to dance, and you feel awkward notice those thoughts that come in your head notice like oh my gosh i’m feeling insecure and be like take your power back and know that you’re just by yourself.
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Jason Mefford: You know matter, we can matter.
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Jen Stillion: And notice if you’ve been somebody who has been attached perfectionism attached to like i’m doing this wrong, where does that come from, and is it true is that really who you are no that’s all bullshit stories loop I swear but that’s okay.
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Jason Mefford: that’s also fun shit and whatever but yeah.
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Jen Stillion: So yeah that’s your cell bullshit.
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Jen Stillion: So it gives you the power to move through those stories and move to the stuff that is was put on you that’s not even yours.
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Jason Mefford: that’s yeah that’s that’s what happens so much of the time right it gets put.
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Jason Mefford: on us.
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Jason Mefford: Totally and then we choose to accept her right so just again like I accepted what my ex wife had said to me.
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Jason Mefford: She said, this would have been like.
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Jason Mefford: 2530 years ago.
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Jen Stillion: Right, I feel.
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Jason Mefford: And it stays it stays with me but but it only stays with me because I chose.
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Jen Stillion: You allow it.
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Jason Mefford: To allow it, and to believe it right and so again it’s like i’m a great dancer right i’m a great dancer I mean I can affirm yourself into it as well, too, but it just just just get up but actually do it right because again it’s it’s the.
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Jason Mefford: You know it’s interesting because we talked about past present future right and part of this is to try to get us into the present.
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Jason Mefford: Because when you think about linear times like that.
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Jason Mefford: We can only be in one linear time at a time right so right now i’m in the present talking with you right my mind, is not going to what am I going to eat for lunch I don’t care i’m right here i’m talking to you right.
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Jason Mefford: So we can only be in one of those linear times.
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Jason Mefford: it’s the same thing when you think about you know if you’re one of those people that’s getting stuck in your head and you want to get out of your head.
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Jason Mefford: Well guess what there’s three areas of your body that you can be in as well, your head your heart and your gut So if you don’t want to be in your head anymore.
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Jason Mefford: feel with your heart or move with your gut and your body and dance is one of those perfect ways, and I think dances is great because it’s both feeling.
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Jason Mefford: mm hmm and doing.
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Jason Mefford: As well right.
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Jen Stillion: yeah exactly and it can go, I mean it goes deep you know it can heal those past traumas or messages that were put on you.
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Jen Stillion: It does so much healing when you’re in the moment and you’re moving and you’re letting go.
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Jen Stillion: you’re just you soon discover that you are moving into self acceptance you’re accepting you for you and you’re accepting your body.
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Jen Stillion: And you know that is something that’s been separated, because a lot of people are like I said it’s a very vulnerable thing because people don’t want.
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Jen Stillion: To be judged on the way they look and how they’re moving their body, and you know your whole in our society We grew up with, like you, are validated on the way you look I know for women, specifically.
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Jen Stillion: So you know when you’re out with a group of people and you’re moving this is why a lot of people have to have a few cocktails before they get on the.
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Jen Stillion: floor yeah because they want to not think about these things they don’t want to feel judged, they want to have that that head that stuff in their head to be removed and be numbed out so they can be free.
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Jen Stillion: So this is, this is the beautiful thing about moving is that they’re like I said there’s some lessons and it gets deeper and it gets into your spirit and it gets into your soul.
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Jen Stillion: And this is why centuries ago there were a tribal dances and there was this is dance was a way of life and use it was a way of life, because it does something to your soul you’re connecting with who you are like on a deep level so.
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Jason Mefford: I think I think that’s one of those things that we’ve lost in our current society.
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Jason Mefford: yeah one of the reasons why I love talking about this kind of stuff because you know again it’s like sometimes we think we’re smarter than people that lived a long time ago.
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Jen Stillion: mm hmm.
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Jason Mefford: Well, I will tell you folks we are stupider.
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Jason Mefford: than than people that live.
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Jason Mefford: You know, a long time ago, because.
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Jason Mefford: You know, again it’s it’s like I get a lot of people that feel like well.
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Jason Mefford: You know now we have the data now we can.
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Jason Mefford: You know, make all these scientific and mathematical calculations and we can determine blah blah blah blah blah right and I don’t need instinct anymore, and never go with your gut I mean I hear people say this all the time and i’m.
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Jason Mefford: You know i’m sitting there thinking so you want to throw out millions of years of human evolution that has got us to this point.
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Jen Stillion: yeah all the wisdom.
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Jason Mefford: All the Wilson.
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Jason Mefford: them all, all of all of the growth and the other thing because again history leaves clues right.
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Jason Mefford: And so again like you said every society has had music and dance incorporated and that has been a very integral part.
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Jason Mefford: Of the society, it allows us to tap into ourselves to become you know, to remember who we are.
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Jason Mefford: To be our authentic self and and so again, this is just one of those tools for you to be able to do it don’t don’t throw out.
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Jason Mefford: Right what all of these past generations for millions of years have been trying to teach us and program into our body yeah let’s just keep using some of those same tools.
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Jen Stillion: yeah yeah if meditation is mainstream and yoga is mainstream everyone’s flocking to yoga meditation subconscious reprogramming eft tapping like these are tools journaling This is just another powerful tool that a lot of people overlook i’m like it’s in you, your body.
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Jen Stillion: Your body is designed to move.
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Jen Stillion: And if you’re not if you’re somebody who does not like to go running and different forms of exercise, you have this this is free it’s free dancin.
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Jason Mefford: Well it’s great exercise.
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Jason Mefford: I mean so so you know you can sit there and say well i’m gonna i’m gonna go walk or i’m going to go run for a little while.
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Jason Mefford: Well, you try dancing hard for 30 minutes you’re going to get a way better Cardio you know exercise out of it and doing some of these other things, so you know it might not be right for you.
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Jason Mefford: But it might be exactly right.
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Jason Mefford: For you as well, like you said you just got lots of different tools it’s something that’s easy its quick I do a little chair dance stuff every so often.
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Jen Stillion: yeah shoulders me.
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Jason Mefford: let’s go.
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Jason Mefford: Right.
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Jason Mefford: Because i’m a great dancer.
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Jason Mefford: Because that’s the story that i’m going to that i’m going to start programming to myself as well.
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Jen Stillion: and
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Jason Mefford: You know, because i’ve been listening to music a lot and trying to i’ve been practicing actually feeling the music right, so we can listen to music.
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Jen Stillion: I feel it.
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Jason Mefford: But we can also feel music and there’s a difference right now i’m going to start incorporating some more movement.
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Jason Mefford: So even if even if you have a fear of dance call it movement or whatever else.
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Jen Stillion: However, I usually call it moving because it’s a trigger word for some people i’m like well, and you know when I do.
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Jen Stillion: Live events, and you know in front of a few hundred people and they don’t know that i’m going to get them up and moving, for the first thing oh my gosh you see half the people like a deer in headlights and the new have the half they’re like.
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Jason Mefford: let’s go yeah.
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Jen Stillion: What do we do, and then after like two or three minutes everyone’s all into it, you know they’re like oh my you know I use fun favorite pop songs they know their song and they get up and i’m like just let go I really move them quickly.
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Jen Stillion: Because when we dance after five or six minutes and they sit down everyone’s shifted and everyone’s like oh my God i’m excited for this presentation and then I weave in dance throughout the presentation, but.
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Jen Stillion: that’s the power of it is just it’s it’s remarkable and yeah like and The thing is, if you’re not if you’re totally against this, this is what I suggest.
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Jen Stillion: Go for a walk but put on your favorite music pumping pay playlist go for a walk you’re still going to start to feel it in your body.
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Jen Stillion: And you’re not going to you’re going to be like on the sidewalk walking out in public and all of a sudden you’re going to bust out and to some kind of move because you can’t help it.
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Jen Stillion: So I start there you know to just to get you out of your head least you’re incorporating some kind of movement with some music that you love and then that’s how it begins.
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Jason Mefford: Like you said, because you can just start incorporating it into.
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Jason Mefford: yeah what you’re already doing.
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Jason Mefford: yeah right and it’s it’s only a couple minutes try it out try it out for 30 days right see if it works for you, but you know again if you if you don’t try it you’re never going to know.
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Jason Mefford: Why, but you might try it and again experience that joy, you know and as you were talking about that, even with the exercise, because I remember, I used to when I was running more frequently, I used to have a playlist and one of the songs that would come on was led zeppelin’s cashmere.
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Jason Mefford: there’s a there’s a there’s a base beat to that last like oh.
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Jason Mefford: right that would that would help me kind of you know, get excited and pumping and my my feet would actually hit the ground.
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Jason Mefford: Was beats why.
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Jason Mefford: And that’s what you’re talking about so even even that it’s not dance but it’s it’s movement with music, which does the same thing.
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Jen Stillion: yeah I mean there’s extraordinary amount of of benefits and it raises your vibration.
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Jen Stillion: so high that at that level what I teach women, as you can start manifesting and creating the things that you want.
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Jen Stillion: So when you’re in that state and you’re thinking about how you want your data unfold to how you want your week to unfold to what you want to create today or this week or this month or this year.
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Jen Stillion: You can start seeing your goals and your visions and your dreams because you’re on that high state and you’re feeling so good it’s like that’s an a window for you to be like.
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Jen Stillion: I can use this and start saying some positive things like I am I think a powerful affirmation that i’ve used with my clients, is, I am a confident answer, because if you say you’re a great dancer it’s great but being attached to what it what is a great dancer is different for everybody.
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Jen Stillion: But just feeling confident in your body, you see yourself show up as confident in every area of your life.
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Jen Stillion: And being confident to move your feet, to create the things that you want to bring into your life, do you see how i’m how dance just opens up all these lessons and all these benefits it’s crazy.
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Jason Mefford: Well, it does, and that you know behavior.
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Jason Mefford: or way of being of being confident is one of those habits that when you develop it makes all the difference right because, again, think about if you do something feeling confident versus doing something when you don’t feel so confident.
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Jason Mefford: Is there a difference in the result.
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Jason Mefford: Of course there is right and again just like Jen said, you know you can you can get up in the morning.
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Jason Mefford: and think about this because, again, everybody you’ve you’ve got through this right is you get up you get up some mornings and you’re like oh i’m so tired I can’t believe I have to do this.
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Jason Mefford: Right so so you’re down in that lower emotional spectrum.
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Jason Mefford: vibrational area.
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Jason Mefford: How do you think your day is going to go well, most of the time when you get up and you start your day that way it ends up being a shitty day.
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Right.
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Jason Mefford: What is what’s different if you get up in the morning you’re excited you’re happy you felt some of that joy, you get up you do a little dance in the morning you’re feeling really great and then you think about or set an intention for your day.
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Jason Mefford: How did your day go then.
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Jason Mefford: yeah much different right.
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Jason Mefford: yeah, so why not why why allow circumstance and the self doubt and and and the overthinking to be what rules your life is that really what you want, or do you want something that you are in control of or you’re feeling more confident and you’re getting the results that you want.
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Jason Mefford: it’s up to you it’s just a little shift right.
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Jen Stillion: It is, and the one of the most just listening to what I want to say about overthinking specifically overthinking and self doubt you know when you are stuck in that.
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Jen Stillion: What you’re really saying to yourself, and you don’t trust yourself so trust comes from listening to your instinct listening to your intuition.
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Jen Stillion: and your soul your soul more powerful than you think you are and you’ve been trained, because I was somebody who was so attached to self doubt.
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Jen Stillion: I kept doubting of what I can create in this life I could doubting my power doubting who I was, and I was so attached to that I lived in that place because it was comfortable.
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Jen Stillion: Because I knew if I started to trust myself and get out of that my head and into my heart, I would have to move through the uncomfortableness move through the stuff that I know I needed to do to get me to the place where I was out of my head.
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Jen Stillion: living in your head it’s costing you so much, and so, when you learn to trust yourself, that is how you become.
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Jen Stillion: Your power for self, that is, that is how you remember who you are when you came to this planet.
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Jen Stillion: And through movement through tools through working on yourself.
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Jen Stillion: opens that up for you so that’s like the bottom line that I learned from experience is learning when you’re dancing and getting out of your head.
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Jen Stillion: you’re learning to trust yourself, because when you’re moving your body there’s no choreography putting up put on you.
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Jen Stillion: You were just trusting whatever movements come through you you’re just you’re just being guided.
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Jen Stillion: You don’t know what you’re going to do with your hands you just go with it it’s totally based on how you feel its motion its energy in motion it’s a mindfulness technique and so that’s, that is what trust is and that’s what trust taught me is through dancing yeah.
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Jason Mefford: yeah well Jen.
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Jason Mefford: Do you yes.
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Jason Mefford: Oh, this is, this is, you know it again, I mean it’s it’s that’s why I wanted you to you know Come on, and talk because hey everybody I needed to hear this too okay so.
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Jason Mefford: So thank you Jen you’re welcome.
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Jason Mefford: But it’s but it’s you know again it’s just another tool in the toolbox try it out.
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Jason Mefford: It might not be for you, but it might be exactly the thing that you need.
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Jason Mefford: right because because again do do you want to feel more confident i’m guessing so.
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Jason Mefford: Most people that I talked to.
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Jason Mefford: that’s the that’s one of the things that they really struggle with is they want to feel more confident, so why not try it out.
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Jason Mefford: dance a little bit in your office in your car when nobody’s looking at first just trust yourself allow the movements to come through you.
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Jason Mefford: Allow your instinct and intuition, to take over, because you know i’ll second what you just said Jen when we when we stay in our head, we are very constricted in our views right.
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Jason Mefford: And we just stay trapped there.
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Jason Mefford: And I see so many people that say stay trapped in their life because they stay trapped in their head.
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Jason Mefford: And it’s the point when you finally move out by using some of these different mindfulness techniques or other things like that to get you out of your head that’s when the transformation happens that’s when you connect back to your authentic self.
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Jason Mefford: Right that’s another term that a lot of people throw out there is authentic well be authentic with yourself, by using some of these things and you’re going to be amazed at what comes through, because I think like you said Jen we are much more powerful than we realize, and when we remember.
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Jason Mefford: Your power returns.
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Jason Mefford: So.
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Jen Stillion: that’s magical.
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Jason Mefford: It is magical it is magical.
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Jason Mefford: Well, Jan anything any final thoughts before we cut out and let everybody get back to their their day.
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Jen Stillion: No, I just like you said try it out just allow it don’t allow the excuses if I don’t have enough time.
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Jen Stillion: You do have the time it’s not even about time it’s about you just committing to this just start with five minutes a day you know incorporate it with your daily life.
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Jen Stillion: You know, take a break from being behind the desk do it in the car and just notice the shift and notice what’s come through you, and just have fun.
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Jason Mefford: and have fun with it and be committed with it.
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Jason Mefford: You know, be committed for 30 days at least try just just do a little bit whatever you’re going to do for 30 days, but I promise you, if you are consistent at the end of the 30 days, you will see a difference in your life.
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Jason Mefford: yeah okay i’ve seen it other people that i’ve worked with have seen it Jen you’ve seen it people you work with have seen it too right.
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Jason Mefford: So, again don’t don’t do this half ass.
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Jason Mefford: don’t just go on and try it once or twice right actually be committed to it be committed to do it for 30 days.
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Jason Mefford: But you will see a difference.
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Jen Stillion: yep absolutely.
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Jason Mefford: You will see a difference so Jen Thank you my friend, you know people want to reach out to you how, how is the best way for people to reach out to you if they want a one to one no more.
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Jen Stillion: My instagram I live on the grams so.
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Jason Mefford: Jen on instagram.
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Jen Stillion: Yes, at Jen stiliyan it’s like a million with STI in front of it so yeah that’s where you can find me.
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Jason Mefford: All right here on the grams you’re on the grams.
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Jason Mefford: Alright well thanks again Jim like I said it’s um I needed to hear it, and I know there’s lots of people listening that needed to hear this exact message to when they’re hearing it as well, so.
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Jason Mefford: Thank you, thank you, thank.
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Jen Stillion: You for having me.
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Jason Mefford: Thank you.
