Science shows that optimists live longer and happier lives than pessimists do. With the world in the state that it is in today, it can be hard to
In today’s episode I discuss with you how we can see the sunny side of life, and always view the glass not only as half full, but overflowing!
Listen in at: http://www.jasonmefford.com/jammingwithjason/
00:00:01.560 –> 00:00:13.620
Jason Mefford: Welcome to another episode of jamming with Jason. Hey. Today we are going to dig into the age old question Is the glass half empty.
00:00:14.130 –> 00:00:34.680
Jason Mefford: Or is it half full, and by the time that we’re dying, you’re actually going to realize that the glass is always full. And I’m going to explain exactly how to do that and give you a tip. In today’s episode. So with that, let’s cue that episode now.
00:00:37.980 –> 00:00:44.790
Jason Mefford: Alright so today’s discussion, let’s let’s talk again, you know, there’s that age old thing. And I’m sure you’ve heard this before.
00:00:45.300 –> 00:00:57.270
Jason Mefford: You know, you’re, you’re sitting there and you look at a glass of water or whatever you want to put in it right whiskey beer, wine water soda, whatever that we’re looking at.
00:00:58.260 –> 00:01:11.700
Jason Mefford: But you’re seeing this class, and it’s filled half with liquid. Now there’s, again, the age old thing, as well as the glass half full or is the glass half empty.
00:01:12.360 –> 00:01:21.240
Jason Mefford: Now, the way that you answer that usually has been determined on whether or not you consider yourself to be an optimist.
00:01:21.600 –> 00:01:31.470
Jason Mefford: Or a pessimist. Right. So if you’re an optimist and in theory they say, look, you would say the glass is half full, because you’re seeing what’s there.
00:01:31.980 –> 00:01:43.110
Jason Mefford: If you’re a pessimist, then you would be saying the glass is half empty. Okay, so that’s kind of the way that this is is normally kind of talked about. We’re going to dig into this a little bit deeper.
00:01:43.620 –> 00:01:49.710
Jason Mefford: And I know you might be sitting here at the beginning of this and thinking, Jason. Why are we actually talking about this today. Okay.
00:01:50.370 –> 00:02:03.510
Jason Mefford: Well, I went back and did did some different research. And again, you know, based on my training. I look at numbers. I look at at information that’s out there and I kind of scratch my head when things don’t seem to make a lot of sense.
00:02:04.770 –> 00:02:11.340
Jason Mefford: And so there’s some things that you see statistically out there that don’t make a lot of sense that I want to talk about today.
00:02:11.880 –> 00:02:21.660
Jason Mefford: But also there’s a lot of research out there that shows that the more optimistic, someone is the healthier, they are
00:02:22.290 –> 00:02:31.950
Jason Mefford: And in fact, on the inverse side pessimists on average die younger than people who are considered to be optimists.
00:02:32.460 –> 00:02:42.420
Jason Mefford: It also has a direct correlation back with some of the health issues that people deal with as well. And part of that is again based on how you view the world.
00:02:43.260 –> 00:02:55.350
Jason Mefford: What’s your interpretations are of what’s going on, but that it can actually have a real and scientifically proven impact on your health.
00:02:55.740 –> 00:03:04.680
Jason Mefford: So, you know, again, if you, if you want to be pessimistic. If you want to stay that way, always see the negative and everything. It’s your choice. You can do that.
00:03:05.310 –> 00:03:24.960
Jason Mefford: But I’m just here to tell you that it’s probably going to lead to some health problems if it hasn’t already, it may lead to some other mental illness issues as well. And we’re going to talk more about that as well. Now, part of part of the issue again kind of with this is that
00:03:26.940 –> 00:03:37.890
Jason Mefford: There’s been a lot of stuff going on. Recently, you know, really, for about the last year. In fact, you know, we’re here into, you know, towards the end of January.
00:03:38.310 –> 00:03:46.590
Jason Mefford: And I was talking to somebody yesterday. And they said, you know, it’s almost been a year that we’ve been living with all of this covert stuff going on in the world.
00:03:47.070 –> 00:03:57.060
Jason Mefford: And it kind of reminded me and stop me and went, Yeah, you know, our first shut down here in California was back in March of last year, so it has almost been a year.
00:03:57.870 –> 00:04:06.690
Jason Mefford: And what we’re starting to see as well is some of the impacts that that is having on people, people are feeling more isolated.
00:04:07.320 –> 00:04:14.520
Jason Mefford: They’re seeing a lot of negativity in the press in the national in the international news that you can see
00:04:15.060 –> 00:04:26.880
Jason Mefford: And really it’s our perspective on how we’re viewing the world around us that helps to determine how positive or negative or optimistic or positive or pessimistic.
00:04:27.360 –> 00:04:38.220
Jason Mefford: That we may actually be right. And what I’m seeing and what the numbers are starting to come back is, you know what, no matter how optimistic and positive you think you are.
00:04:38.760 –> 00:04:47.580
Jason Mefford: After a while, it just starts to grind on you okay it just starts to grind on you and it’s hard to keep the positive attitude.
00:04:47.970 –> 00:04:59.700
Jason Mefford: When you’re seeing a bunch of negative things around you and a lot of people have been feeling this this is leading people into, you know, some mild depression, some feelings of isolation and other things like that.
00:05:00.390 –> 00:05:07.080
Jason Mefford: That we weren’t experiencing maybe a year ago because we weren’t living with this current world that we are in
00:05:08.130 –> 00:05:17.820
Jason Mefford: So again, one of the reasons why I want to talk about this is, I mean, there’s obviously some health issues that can can relate to it. But also, you know, most of the people that listen to me.
00:05:18.450 –> 00:05:37.290
Jason Mefford: Actually also come from the internal audit risk and compliance area and professionally. We are usually taught to see on the negative side or be pessimistic be skeptical and what we’re looking at. In fact, when I was talking with somebody today.
00:05:39.090 –> 00:05:46.740
Jason Mefford: They actually shared a story with me. They were, they were having a disagreement with someone in the organization and other executive
00:05:47.250 –> 00:05:55.980
Jason Mefford: And the person was being overly optimistic in in in the way that this internal audit person was looking at and saying, well, you know,
00:05:56.910 –> 00:06:06.990
Jason Mefford: And that’s where they stopped and actually said, you know, you are a, you know, glass half empty kind of person. I’m a glass half full person. This is why we’re having the disagreement.
00:06:07.560 –> 00:06:17.850
Jason Mefford: And the person an audit said, well, that’s, that’s, I understand that because that’s my responsibility, right, is to look for the negative or that kind of side of it.
00:06:18.510 –> 00:06:27.720
Jason Mefford: And so I get it, I understand, you know, we have been taught that way. That’s really our, our, kind of professional training and what we end up looking at a lot of the time.
00:06:28.260 –> 00:06:38.040
Jason Mefford: Now the problem is because we have been taught to do that professionally and we get stuck into, you know, doing that so much professionally.
00:06:38.580 –> 00:06:46.800
Jason Mefford: That sometimes that ends up carrying over into our personal life as well. And so again, today I want to talk a little bit about and give you a tip.
00:06:47.190 –> 00:06:55.410
Jason Mefford: On how to get out of that. If you find yourself in that situation. Now again, I’m sure, as you’re listening to this, you’re thinking
00:06:55.770 –> 00:07:01.830
Jason Mefford: Jason I don’t have any problem with this. I’m a very positive very optimistic person.
00:07:02.280 –> 00:07:08.670
Jason Mefford: So let’s talk about some numbers here for just a minute. Okay. Because again, I told you when I went back and looked at the numbers.
00:07:09.000 –> 00:07:14.100
Jason Mefford: Some of the numbers don’t make sense, folks. So, so this is again where we’re going to, we’re going to kind of go through this
00:07:14.640 –> 00:07:30.960
Jason Mefford: So at least a study that I looked at here in the United States when people were asked, are you an optimist or a pessimist. Okay, so that was the question, are you up an optimistic person or a pessimistic person.
00:07:32.130 –> 00:07:46.320
Jason Mefford: 50% of the people said that they believed they were an optimistic person 50%. Okay, makes sense right 50% optimistic maybe 50% pessimistic. Right. That’s how you might look at it statistically
00:07:46.950 –> 00:08:00.630
Jason Mefford: Well, the interesting thing is 50% said they’re an optimist 43% said there somewhere in between and only four to 6% of people actually admitted that they’re a pessimist.
00:08:01.230 –> 00:08:13.080
Jason Mefford: Okay, those numbers don’t add up. Do you get that. Did you hear what I just said 50% think they’re optimistic 43% say there’s somewhere in the middle. So they’re neither pessimistic nor optimistic.
00:08:13.560 –> 00:08:24.090
Jason Mefford: And only about four to 6% of the people actually admit that they are on average more pessimistic those numbers don’t line up. Okay.
00:08:24.870 –> 00:08:33.240
Jason Mefford: You either are or you aren’t. It’s a binary thing. And yes, I understand why 43% of the people would say, well, maybe sometimes I’m optimistic.
00:08:33.540 –> 00:08:46.140
Jason Mefford: But sometimes I’m pessimistic. So I’m neither one all of the time. And I get that I mean that that happens all the time. We can be optimistic about certain things and pessimistic about other things.
00:08:46.650 –> 00:09:03.480
Jason Mefford: In fact, on average, people tend to be optimistic when they’re talking about micro things or things that relate to themselves, but very pessimistic when it’s about politics. It’s about national, international kind of things.
00:09:04.590 –> 00:09:14.160
Jason Mefford: Tend to be very pessimistic about those things instead. In fact, another study that I look like or looked at. And again, this is from
00:09:15.450 –> 00:09:26.490
Jason Mefford: Data all around the world. But what I will tell you is the average in the developing nations is very similar to this information that I’m going to share about the United States.
00:09:27.090 –> 00:09:38.490
Jason Mefford: There’s some that are, you know, higher, lower but on average the median for the developing world is about the same. And this was the question that was asked, there is
00:09:39.660 –> 00:09:51.120
Jason Mefford: Do you think the future is better financially for younger people, or is the past, better. So our younger people going to be better off financially in the future.
00:09:51.900 –> 00:10:03.000
Jason Mefford: Than their parents were and only 6% of people in the United States think that young people will be better off than their parents.
00:10:03.360 –> 00:10:15.870
Jason Mefford: That means 94% of people think they’re going to be worse off. So they have a very pessimistic outlook on the future financially for young people.
00:10:16.230 –> 00:10:29.220
Jason Mefford: Okay. And again, if 50% of the people are saying that they’re optimists those numbers don’t really line up right because 90 you know 94% of the people are being pessimistic about that particular
00:10:30.090 –> 00:10:39.210
Jason Mefford: Thing that we’re that we’re talking about. Okay, so why am I going to go into all of this. Well, part of it is just to shake you a little bit GIVE YOU A LITTLE BIT OF A love tap
00:10:39.600 –> 00:10:55.080
Jason Mefford: In that, you know, no matter how optimistic, you believe you are. You may not be as optimistic as you think you are. Okay. And so again, going back to cognitive biases.
00:10:56.130 –> 00:11:03.360
Jason Mefford: It’s very clear for people, you know, for 50% of the people to say, well, yeah, I think I’m optimistic, right, because again,
00:11:03.690 –> 00:11:18.030
Jason Mefford: That is a cognitive bias that ends up creeping into where we believe that we’re much more optimistic than we are. Okay, so, so let me just ask a few questions. Right. And again, it’s, it’s nothing. You know, good or bad.
00:11:18.750 –> 00:11:31.230
Jason Mefford: That I’m trying to get out here. But what I’m, what I’m trying to teach you and show you is a way that you can change the interpretations that you have of what is going on around you.
00:11:31.800 –> 00:11:45.000
Jason Mefford: Because the thing is, a lot of people get into a victim mentality when they are feeling pessimistic and they think things are happening to them and they cannot control these things.
00:11:45.450 –> 00:12:02.040
Jason Mefford: Where again a different interpretation would be things don’t happen to me things happen for me and I can control and have influence over the circumstances and conditions in my life.
00:12:02.490 –> 00:12:11.340
Jason Mefford: And that’s where I want to help you get to so that you get out of being pessimistic about the future is going to be crap you know things are actually getting worse.
00:12:12.030 –> 00:12:23.100
Jason Mefford: And there’s a reason why a lot of people feel that way is, you know, in a lot of the different media that we consume. So, for example, another thing that’s out there is
00:12:23.820 –> 00:12:32.280
Jason Mefford: A lot of people believe that crime and violence is going up. Now, why would they believe that
00:12:32.970 –> 00:12:42.360
Jason Mefford: And part of the reason is there’s a lot of TV shows. There’s a lot of news. There’s, it’s 24 seven now where they choose to
00:12:43.080 –> 00:12:52.710
Jason Mefford: Focus on a lot of the stuff that leads to fear. And so a lot of the things that are reported on are these negative things that put people in fear.
00:12:53.010 –> 00:13:08.460
Jason Mefford: And so the, the, you know, criminal activity violence, other things like that are showing in the media, but it’s actually a very, very small percentage of what is actually going on.
00:13:08.850 –> 00:13:19.500
Jason Mefford: Because again, if you go back and you take a look at the data in fact criminal activity has in violence has decreased steadily for many, many years.
00:13:19.890 –> 00:13:27.120
Jason Mefford: Even though. Again, the perception by a lot of people is, oh it’s becoming a more violent world in general. Okay.
00:13:27.510 –> 00:13:39.930
Jason Mefford: And so part of the reason why a lot of people feel pessimistic is again because they’re getting fed all of this stuff. And that’s what they’re seeing all of the time. Okay, so one tip for you is
00:13:41.070 –> 00:13:50.430
Jason Mefford: If you’re feeling stressed out. If you’re feeling fearful. If you’re feeling anxiety because of all of these bad things that you’re afraid are going to happen.
00:13:51.120 –> 00:14:00.300
Jason Mefford: Just stop listening to everything. Now I quit actually listening to the news. Many, many years ago I quit reading the newspaper.
00:14:01.050 –> 00:14:13.230
Jason Mefford: I do, actually, you know, stay current on some of the on some of the current events. But the reality is most of it does not affect me. It doesn’t actually apply to me.
00:14:13.770 –> 00:14:21.750
Jason Mefford: And I think I shared earlier on the podcast. You know, when my when my father in law was still alive. He used to like to watch the evening news.
00:14:22.530 –> 00:14:30.330
Jason Mefford: And so when we would go up and and be with them in the evening. A lot of times I would sit there and watch the news with him.
00:14:30.900 –> 00:14:40.230
Jason Mefford: And you know, we live in the Los Angeles area. There’s, there’s, you know, 20 plus million people in the Los Angeles area. So a lot of people
00:14:40.830 –> 00:14:57.060
Jason Mefford: But if I were to watch just what was going on on the news, they’re, you know, they’re reporting a break in and they’re reporting a, you know, car chase and something else and the 30 minute segment. Most of the stories are going to be kind of negative in in that regards right
00:14:58.560 –> 00:15:09.450
Jason Mefford: And when you consider the percentage of that in comparison to the 20 plus million people that are here. It’s a very, very small percentage of what’s actually going on.
00:15:09.810 –> 00:15:19.470
Jason Mefford: Right. In fact 99.9% of the people that are out there are doing good things are good people and we have nothing to worry about. Okay.
00:15:20.190 –> 00:15:27.510
Jason Mefford: So again, a lot of this that comes back to your interpretation and your perspective on things as well.
00:15:27.870 –> 00:15:36.600
Jason Mefford: So, you know, again, don’t feed yourself necessarily with things that do not relate to you that do not actually help you
00:15:36.990 –> 00:15:43.680
Jason Mefford: And later on, I’m going to talk about a thing called seven interpretations. That’s a tool that you can actually use for this.
00:15:44.220 –> 00:15:55.230
Jason Mefford: Now again, as I told you, I understand that many of you are trained to always look for the risk look for problems because that’s what we do in our profession. Okay.
00:15:55.800 –> 00:16:05.640
Jason Mefford: But again, just like I was talking about from the, from the media or anything else like that when you are constantly hearing about negative things
00:16:05.970 –> 00:16:19.740
Jason Mefford: That ends up carrying over into your emotional state and how you feel, as well. So again, you have to be able to flip the switch and and and separate business from your personal life.
00:16:20.250 –> 00:16:27.840
Jason Mefford: Now I know you know it’s easy to say, well, I do that already, but it’s it’s much more difficult than that. Okay.
00:16:28.200 –> 00:16:33.360
Jason Mefford: And and I will, I will, you know, totally understand that because I’ve had the same thing, you know.
00:16:33.750 –> 00:16:43.860
Jason Mefford: You come home after a hard day at work, a lot of stress. A lot of negativity, you’re not feeling so good and and something ends up going wrong and you end up
00:16:44.310 –> 00:16:57.060
Jason Mefford: Maybe not acting the way that you normally would. Under a normal situation and and this ends up happening a lot when whenever we’re hungry. If we’re feeling anger.
00:16:57.540 –> 00:17:05.850
Jason Mefford: If we feel lonely or if we feel tired. Those are all things that end up causing us to kind of, you know,
00:17:06.660 –> 00:17:17.940
Jason Mefford: Leak our personal power and leads us to sometimes doing things that we don’t want to do or don’t intend to do that. We usually have to go back and apologize about afterwards.
00:17:18.570 –> 00:17:25.530
Jason Mefford: So again, as, as I’m going through this and talking to you about it, optimism versus pessimism. Right. And I’m going to
00:17:27.180 –> 00:17:37.230
Jason Mefford: Get my words out a little bit here. So let’s go back again to the whole you know is the glass half full or is the glass half empty.
00:17:37.770 –> 00:17:44.610
Jason Mefford: Now a lot of times in life we end up creating kind of binary decisions like that.
00:17:45.390 –> 00:17:55.200
Jason Mefford: And so again, if we were to sit down and argue about this. Well, it’s either the glass is half full or the glass is half empty. There’s two truths, one is true and one is false.
00:17:55.620 –> 00:18:02.430
Jason Mefford: And we could argue back and forth and maybe I, I believe that the glass is half full. You believe that the glass is half empty.
00:18:03.060 –> 00:18:13.470
Jason Mefford: But what I want to stop here and ask you is, are those the only two interpretations that we can make from what we’re looking at.
00:18:14.100 –> 00:18:21.330
Jason Mefford: Because what ends up happening a lot of times is a lot of the the arguments that we have with people the things that are that are going on.
00:18:21.660 –> 00:18:31.380
Jason Mefford: There’s not just one or two options. There’s usually a multitude of different options that we can consider
00:18:31.980 –> 00:18:37.830
Jason Mefford: And so when we get in and talk about the seven interpretations. That’s going to be one of the tools that you can use.
00:18:38.610 –> 00:18:48.630
Jason Mefford: To help you, especially if you happen to be interpreting something that is going on. And maybe it’s negative or not something that you want to actually happen.
00:18:49.080 –> 00:19:03.150
Jason Mefford: Is, is there another way for me to look at this in a different way. Okay, so again, let’s go back to our is the glass half full or the glass half empty.
00:19:03.660 –> 00:19:14.730
Jason Mefford: Well, what I would tell you is the glass is always full. The glass is always full. Regardless of how much liquid is in it.
00:19:15.180 –> 00:19:24.930
Jason Mefford: Because there is space within the cup. And in fact, there’s a ratio of liquid to air in that cup.
00:19:25.500 –> 00:19:38.850
Jason Mefford: So again, the cup is neither half full, nor half empty. It’s actually always full. It’s just the ratio of liquid to air within that glass.
00:19:39.570 –> 00:19:47.910
Jason Mefford: So stop and think about that for a while. Right. That may be the first time that you’ve actually heard a different perspective on that old thing.
00:19:48.510 –> 00:19:58.230
Jason Mefford: And why am I telling you that because again you know if we’re arguing about the glass is half full or the glass is half empty, and you don’t really like either of those stories.
00:19:58.560 –> 00:20:06.480
Jason Mefford: Maybe there’s a different story or a different interpretation that would serve you better than that.
00:20:06.990 –> 00:20:21.570
Jason Mefford: And so, again, the interpretation that I have taken is the glasses and either half full or half empty. It’s always full. It’s full of air and it’s full of whatever liquid happens to be in there.
00:20:22.200 –> 00:20:30.510
Jason Mefford: So let’s get in now and and talk about, you know, as I kind of wrap up here, this little tip or hack that you can use.
00:20:31.290 –> 00:20:40.770
Jason Mefford: When you find yourself in a situation where maybe you’re starting to become more pessimistic or you’re starting to look at things in a negative way.
00:20:41.130 –> 00:20:49.890
Jason Mefford: And you want to get yourself out of it. Okay, so again this is a tool to help you change your interpretation, change the way you’re thinking about it.
00:20:50.280 –> 00:20:59.430
Jason Mefford: If you want to think everything is horrible and negative, then you can just keep on doing that. But if you actually want to change your emotional state.
00:21:00.000 –> 00:21:11.760
Jason Mefford: If you want to grow and you want to get out of those feelings, maybe a fear and anxiety related to a particular thing. Here’s one way that you can do that.
00:21:12.180 –> 00:21:21.540
Jason Mefford: And it’s called the seven interpretations. Okay, now this is the kind of thing that I share with people in the briefing leadership program that I run all the time.
00:21:22.140 –> 00:21:27.990
Jason Mefford: But as I told you before, you know, I want to give you a little tips here. Each week, but if you want all of them.
00:21:28.500 –> 00:21:41.970
Jason Mefford: There in the briefing leadership program. So, but this one the seven interpretations. Here is how this would work. So again, let’s say that something ends up happening. I’m going to come up with kind of a generic
00:21:43.260 –> 00:21:44.250
Jason Mefford: generic thing.
00:21:46.080 –> 00:21:47.940
Jason Mefford: To be able to help explain this idea
00:21:49.200 –> 00:22:05.520
Jason Mefford: Because we end up in relationships with people all the time every day that we’re that we’re relating to somebody. And so again, let’s let’s assume I’m going to use my wife and myself as an example. Okay. Is is let’s say that
00:22:06.690 –> 00:22:18.360
Jason Mefford: You know her, and I end up out on our back patio or sitting down and we’re just enjoying some quiet time and I can sense that she’s annoyed.
00:22:18.990 –> 00:22:30.690
Jason Mefford: By at something. Okay, I don’t know what it is. And so at that point. Right. I can start making different interpretations about what’s going on.
00:22:31.110 –> 00:22:37.980
Jason Mefford: This is our glass half full half empty, kind of thing, right. I could sit there and say, Oh, you know, my wife is a little annoyed.
00:22:38.340 –> 00:23:01.620
Jason Mefford: What did I do wrong today or what did I do that may be annoyed her and now she’s mad at me. Okay, that’s an interpretation that I could start to make my wife is annoyed, therefore I must have done something to annoy her and maybe she’s mad at me now. Okay, that’s interpretation.
00:23:02.790 –> 00:23:10.650
Jason Mefford: And I could go with that. And all of a sudden I could start, you know, feeling like she doesn’t like me right now. I’ve done something wrong.
00:23:11.040 –> 00:23:20.130
Jason Mefford: And you can end up going down a whole rabbit hole of and you can see how that could end up affecting my emotional state. Right.
00:23:20.490 –> 00:23:30.600
Jason Mefford: Because now all of a sudden, I’m thinking, Oh no, you know, maybe I did something wrong. I’m not feeling that great about myself. What did I forget to do this time. Oh, dumb Jason, whatever. Right.
00:23:31.140 –> 00:23:43.080
Jason Mefford: It starts going through my head coming out of my mouth and me being worried or in some sort of fear or anxiety that she’s mad at me for some reason.
00:23:43.860 –> 00:23:52.200
Jason Mefford: Now, that’s one interpretation. Are there any other interpretations that could be there. Well of course there are right.
00:23:52.530 –> 00:23:58.680
Jason Mefford: Someone else could have annoyed her. Maybe she just got off the phone with one of her friends or a family member.
00:23:59.220 –> 00:24:14.010
Jason Mefford: And that annoyed her and it had absolutely nothing to do with me. Maybe she just has a headache and it’s not, I’m looking at her thinking that maybe she is annoyed, and instead she just has a has a headache right
00:24:15.150 –> 00:24:24.900
Jason Mefford: You can see where this could end up going right. So the idea with the seven interpretations is if you are in a situation
00:24:25.350 –> 00:24:30.360
Jason Mefford: And you don’t really like the interpretation that you’re getting or that you’re seeing from this
00:24:31.170 –> 00:24:45.570
Jason Mefford: sit down and write out seven other interpretations that could relate to this. So again, right, maybe I didn’t do anything. Maybe you know she talked to a friend or family and they annoyed her
00:24:45.900 –> 00:24:55.410
Jason Mefford: Maybe she has a headache right there’s there’s three go through until you get through to seven and then stop and take a look at that and think about
00:24:55.770 –> 00:25:10.230
Jason Mefford: Which of those interpretations actually serves me the best. And that’s the one that you go with okay because the reality is, I mean, I know I’ve done this myself sometimes.
00:25:11.310 –> 00:25:15.060
Jason Mefford: I just get annoyed, and I don’t know why. Right, something
00:25:16.170 –> 00:25:24.030
Jason Mefford: Something happened. I don’t even remember. But maybe all of a sudden, I’m kind of feeling a little bit of a funk and people do that right
00:25:24.540 –> 00:25:36.240
Jason Mefford: I might not even realize. And so again, there’s no reason for me to worry and fret about that because it’s probably not true anyway.
00:25:36.810 –> 00:25:48.360
Jason Mefford: And so what we can do is actually come up with interpretations that serve us better. So again, if I if I sit down and I see that my wife is annoyed.
00:25:49.230 –> 00:25:54.450
Jason Mefford: I’m not going to pick an interpretation that says, Oh, she must be mad at me because I did something wrong.
00:25:54.990 –> 00:26:06.090
Jason Mefford: That doesn’t really serve me it doesn’t really serve her either as well. Right. And again, I can start asking questions, we can kind of see what’s going on at that point.
00:26:06.600 –> 00:26:19.020
Jason Mefford: But, you know, sometimes. And let’s take this back to what I told you before, is a lot of times when we, when we start feeling pessimistic or we’re worried about things, or we’re fearful about things.
00:26:19.470 –> 00:26:26.490
Jason Mefford: A lot of times it’s because of an interpretation that we are making about something that is going on.
00:26:27.120 –> 00:26:42.450
Jason Mefford: And again, a lot of times we feel like, Well, things are happening to me. And instead, change your interpretation to it’s not happening to me. But it’s happening for me. And so as an example right if if
00:26:43.740 –> 00:26:49.350
Jason Mefford: You know we happen to be working on something we’re working through something or maybe
00:26:51.390 –> 00:26:51.720
Jason Mefford: Yeah.
00:26:52.740 –> 00:26:57.150
Jason Mefford: As an example right you know somebody that you may be talking to
00:26:58.320 –> 00:27:02.910
Jason Mefford: And they’re really struggling with with something that’s going on in their life.
00:27:03.990 –> 00:27:17.430
Jason Mefford: You know, and again, it’s what is it you know that’s going on in their particular mind that’s leading them to feel that particular way. Right.
00:27:17.790 –> 00:27:23.160
Jason Mefford: And so again, you know, I’ve seen this in my life, certain things that are happening to where
00:27:23.610 –> 00:27:32.670
Jason Mefford: You know, it just feels like something is really, really hard. As an example, right, that I just can’t get something done.
00:27:33.210 –> 00:27:38.070
Jason Mefford: Well, what’s the interpretation that I’m putting on that.
00:27:38.670 –> 00:27:45.420
Jason Mefford: Am I putting an interpretation on it that you know because it’s really hard. And because I’m having a hard time doing it.
00:27:45.750 –> 00:27:54.810
Jason Mefford: That it’s not something that I should do or that it has something to do with me as an individual that I have no worth that I’m stupid that I’m whatever right
00:27:55.170 –> 00:28:04.830
Jason Mefford: And I’m saying some of these things and you know again what we don’t realize is, a lot of times we are actually saying things like that in our head right
00:28:05.370 –> 00:28:13.260
Jason Mefford: Well, what’s the interpretation that I want to put on it. Is it instead. Is it going to be hard is that the interpretation that I want to put on it.
00:28:13.770 –> 00:28:28.890
Jason Mefford: Or do I want to put a different interpretation on it like it’s easy. You know, it’s something that I can actually work through or maybe it’s actually something that I no longer need to pursue myself right
00:28:29.580 –> 00:28:40.170
Jason Mefford: And so again, sometimes we we can we can push, push, push, push, push, and we end up hurting ourselves more let me, let me give you an example of this. Right.
00:28:41.400 –> 00:28:48.210
Jason Mefford: When I was a teenager, I wanted to play professional basketball. I love basketball. When I was a teenager.
00:28:49.980 –> 00:29:04.200
Jason Mefford: I wasn’t very good. I’ll give you that. Okay, but I really enjoyed playing basketball. The problem was, I stopped growing at about five foot nine. So I’m only five foot nine
00:29:04.890 –> 00:29:19.620
Jason Mefford: That’s not a very good height to play in the National Basketball Association. Okay, you need to be much much taller than that in order to be able to play in the NBA. Now, at that point, you know, again,
00:29:20.850 –> 00:29:33.000
Jason Mefford: I have to decide and make a different interpretation is that something that I want to continue trying to pursue, or is there another path that I should go down, you know, and again
00:29:34.110 –> 00:29:44.100
Jason Mefford: I’m not going to beat myself up over the fact that I didn’t become a professional basketball player that would not do me any good. Right.
00:29:44.640 –> 00:30:04.350
Jason Mefford: There’s other things that I’m good at. I don’t have to play in the NBA. And so the fact that I can actually make a different interpretation about that and choose to move on and do something different is what we need to do, right. So again, there are things that we can do.
00:30:05.790 –> 00:30:16.470
Jason Mefford: To move on to change and to just leave the past behind us, because as I talked about to begin with, you know, when I see this in so many people is
00:30:18.270 –> 00:30:29.370
Jason Mefford: In. And again, as I said, especially now because of a lot of the things that we’re going through a lot of people feel like we’re never going to get out of this coven thing, right.
00:30:30.120 –> 00:30:38.130
Jason Mefford: A lot of people are starting to go down that path and feel like it’s going to, it’s going to take forever. This is never gonna. This is never going to change.
00:30:38.490 –> 00:30:44.730
Jason Mefford: Things are getting worse and oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh. Well, again, we can just stop.
00:30:45.180 –> 00:30:56.820
Jason Mefford: And choose to change our interpretation choose to change our perspective as well. Right. And so again, there’s always opportunity and everything that’s going on.
00:30:57.210 –> 00:31:02.280
Jason Mefford: Hopefully, you know, you’ve seen, and I know I’ve seen this in my family and with others is
00:31:02.880 –> 00:31:17.340
Jason Mefford: This has been an opportunity right to see the the optimistic, the positive side of this in that, you know, I think now we all appreciate the people in our lives a little bit more
00:31:18.090 –> 00:31:27.570
Jason Mefford: We, we, you know, are getting a little bit out of the rat race and realizing and starting to focus more on what is actually important to us.
00:31:27.960 –> 00:31:34.080
Jason Mefford: And again, that’s really what we should be getting out of anytime things like this are coming along.
00:31:34.560 –> 00:31:47.130
Jason Mefford: So don’t don’t think that the world is falling all apart, it is not things are actually good if we can, you know, continue to stay positive and in really kind of
00:31:47.580 –> 00:31:56.460
Jason Mefford: Keep that positive optimistic attitude. Again, if you feel like you’re you’re having struggles with that. Then again, stop.
00:31:56.940 –> 00:32:04.560
Jason Mefford: Think about what are some other different interpretations that you can put on this and try to find an optimistic or positive spin about it.
00:32:04.980 –> 00:32:15.900
Jason Mefford: And what I’m, what I’m telling you, I’m not telling you not to be realistic. But there’s a lot of stories that we tell ourselves that don’t service. And so again,
00:32:17.070 –> 00:32:30.390
Jason Mefford: Let’s be more positive. The glass is always full and try to find again other interpretations for you to be happier to have a more positive mental attitude.
00:32:30.720 –> 00:32:41.010
Jason Mefford: And to actually go out and get the things in life that you want. Because I’ll tell you, being a pessimist and being a victim. Just keep us stuck where you are.
00:32:41.400 –> 00:32:59.370
Jason Mefford: And it’s only by trying to break through that and get moving forward that you can actually have a life that you want. That’s beyond your wildest dreams. And with that, I’m going to wrap up for today and I’ll catch you on the next episode of jam room with Jason. See ya.